Love doesn’t always fit into neat comparisons, especially when grief is still part of the story.

So, what would you do if your girlfriend asked whether you loved her more than your late spouse, and wouldn’t drop it until you answered? Would you lie to protect her feelings? Or would you tell the truth?

In the following story, one widower finds himself in this situation and can’t bring himself to lie. Here’s what happened.

AITAH for not lying to my girlfriend when she wants me to lie to her?

I (47M) am a widower of 4 years, and my girlfriend (45F) of 9 months is a divorcee of 6 years.

She asked me the other day if I loved her more than my deceased wife. My heart broke immediately because I knew the truth would hurt her.

So I said, “Please don’t ask questions like that, it’s unfair to you and her memory”.

He spent 20 years with his wife.

Today she asked again, and no matter how much I tried not to answer, she pushed for an answer. I thought about lying and saying, “Yes, I love you more than her,” but I couldn’t.

My wife and I started dating at 15 and married at 23, 20 years of marriage, had two kids, and loved each other through the good, bad, and ugly parts of life.

When she was taken from us, I didn’t think I could live through the pain.

Regardless of what she wanted, he didn’t lie.

I love my girlfriend, but I won’t dishonor my wife’s memory by saying I love her more than I loved my wife.

So after a lot of pressure to answer, I said, “No, I don’t love you more than my wife, but I love you very much, and what we have shouldn’t be in competition with my marriage.”

Then went on and on to try to make the situation better, but I think I failed.

AITA?

Eek! It’s easy to see both sides of this, but that is a very unfair question.

Let’s check out how the folks over at Reddit feel about this situation.

For this person, that woman was out of line.

According to this comment, they couldn’t look at her the same.

This reader thinks he should break up with her if she keeps it up.

Here’s someone who thinks the girlfriend is out of line.

She needs to grow up, because that’s not a question you should ever ask someone.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.