Supporting your friends is great…until it starts feeling like an obligation.

She’s juggling two jobs, covering most household expenses, and handling the bulk of the cooking and cleaning—while her roommate struggles to keep up and relies on her parents financially. So when she casually mentions her weekend plans to get her nails and eyebrows done, she’s not expecting it to turn into a sales pitch.

Suddenly, her roommate (a licensed but not exactly salon-level in practice) is offering her services…and making it clear she’d rather her spend money at home than go out.

AITA for not wanting my roommate to do my nails.

I (21F) have a roommate (22F) and we’ve been living together for the past few months. There are some issues that are annoying here and there but I’m planning to move out after graduation.

For some more context, my roommate doesn’t have a job and relies on her parents to pay for rent, food, and gas.

I work two jobs so I’ve been paying for the majority of groceries and household items for the past few months. I also am the main person who cooks and cleans.

What a boss babe.

My roommate has ADHD so I see how much she struggles, I’ll come back home from work and she’ll still be working on the same thing she was when I left or she always has coursework due last minute.

I am more than happy to pick up the slack because I do love her and I know it’s rough out there.

I did resent her initially and we discussed her lack of contribution to the upkeep but I realized it does me no good and either way I’d still have to cook, clean, buy groceries and household essentials for myself even if I lived alone.

What a smart way to look at it.

The whole issue started yesterday when I mentioned this weekend I was going to be so busy because in addition to hanging out with friends, I have to do “girl maintenance” like getting my eyebrows and face threaded and nails done.

She said “Should I be offended? I can do your nails and eyebrows.”

I laughed nervously and she continued on, “you know I need money, you don’t need to go to a salon I can do them for you at home”

Oh…

Yes, she’s a licensed cosmetologist, her work isn’t what I’m looking for. I get my eyebrows threaded at this local Indian place and they know how to handle my eyebrow shape and facial hair (shoutout to PCOS).

Additionally, whenever she does her own nails it takes literally half a day and she makes a huge mess and she already isn’t the cleanest so I’m nervous about her tools.

Also, I don’t want to sound entitled but I feel like her service should be free? She doesn’t have that much professional experience and I do cover for her quite often.

Truth…

Last time, I got my nails done she was also a bit upset that I spent money at a salon and not with her.

I don’t want to be an unsupportive friend and roommate, j get that she needs the money but I don’t see how paying her would be equivalent to salon quality services.

Maybe I’m missing something here?

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While supporting a friend is nice, most felt it shouldn’t come at the cost of paying for something you’re not confident in or don’t actually want.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who doesn’t want to go to the amusement park with her friend anymore, because the friend can no longer ride most of the attractions.

This person says NTA, and has an idea.

This person agrees with OP with one caveat.

And this person says there is in no way an obligation to have the roommate work on her.

Friendship doesn’t automatically come with a standing appointment…or a bill.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a professor who missed a major funding deadline after they told their graduate student to leave them alone.