Airports can be overwhelming, especially for first-time travelers. But add a high-energy toddler into the mix, and things can get even more chaotic.

So what would you do if your ex, who has never flown before and has a history of losing your child in public places, wanted to take him on an international flight? Would you trust him to handle it the right way? Or would you put your foot down to protect your child’s safety?

In the following story, one mother must make this exact decision. Here’s how she sees it.

AITA for not allowing my son’s father (my ex) to fly on vacation with him?

So my ex (47m) asked me (31f) last week if I would be okay with him flying to another country with our son (3m). The little one lives with me, but we have shared custody, so he has to ask for my permission; otherwise, it could be considered kidnapping.

My ex has never flown before. Never seen an airport from the inside. He has no idea what he needs to do there, where to go, or whatever. In general, he’s (weaponized) incompetent in person.

I also know that he has a short temper, and when he gets just a little bit upset or annoyed, he will snap at our son, and my biggest fear is that he might lose him in an airport. He’s already lost him 3 times in different supermarkets.

The little one can be a lot. He craves attention and is very adventurous, so he would definitely run off and keep his dad busy. He’s also very sensitive when it comes to loud noises and strangers.

Nervous for her son’s safety, she declines.

All of that has led me to my decision to not allow it. I’ve thought about a “leash” for the kid, but I know for sure my ex wouldn’t use it if I bought one.

My suggestion to him was that he should fly on his own first so he knows the procedure for airports and hotels, etc.

I told him that I was perfectly fine with him taking the little one on vacation as long as they could get there by car.

I told my mom about the situation, and she said I was overreacting and that I should let the ex do what he likes. My sister-in-law said it was a tough decision, and she understands where I’m coming from.

AITA?

Yikes! It’s easy to see both of their sides, but safety is paramount.

Let’s check out what advice the fine folks over at Reddit have to offer for her.

As this person points out, you should never chance your baby getting lost.

This person won’t fly with their child.

These are excellent points.

Here’s someone who’s a parent and has flown around the world.

It’s better to be safe than sorry. The dad needs to get some flying experience under his belt first.

And honestly, he should probably work on not losing his kid in public before even thinking about an international trip.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.