Imagine dealing with the death of your father, your mother remarrying, and now, new half siblings thrown into the mix. Would you be ready to embrace these half siblings as if they’re full siblings, or would you secretly wish you were still an only child?

In today’s story, one teenage girl has been through a lot of big changes in her family in the past few years, and she isn’t coping with the changes the way her mother had hoped. Now, she’s wondering if she’s wrong for being honest about her feelings or if lying is really the way to go.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for refusing to lie to cover up what my mom realized about me?

When I (16f) was 10 I lost my dad.

My parents were in a “transitional period” as my moms parents called it in the weeks prior to his death. What I think that means is they were trying to figure out how to divorce without messing me up.

But I thought it was pretty clear my parents relationship was done. They hadn’t seemed happy in so long and I don’t remember them being affectionate with each other.

Her mom eventually met someone new.

Within a year of my dad dying my mom met “Harvey” and they were dating for two years when she introduced me and him.

He seemed okay. I wasn’t like OMG so excited to have my mom dating someone. But it was fine.

Mom asked me what I thought and I told her he seemed okay and she was really happy which was nice.

She asked me if I thought he’d make a good bonus dad and I told her I hated how that sounded.

It seems that they agreed to disagree.

We talked and she admitted she wanted to pick someone I could see being the new father figure in my life. She said it didn’t have to be an only dad thing but even if I loved someone enough to think of them as a second dad.

I told her that wouldn’t happen but I’d be fine with Harvey sticking around and being married to her if she wanted that.

We went to therapy and Harvey eventually joined us and by the time we were done I was almost 15 and they were married and mom was pregnant.

The family has gotten even bigger.

My mom had two kids in the last 18 months.

My half brother is 17 months old and my half sister is 3 months old.

Things were kind of crazy when my half brother was born so mom didn’t do any kind of party or celebration of his birth.

Since she and Harvey made sure they won’t have more kids mom decided to throw a party to celebrate the kids being born.

She explains how she feels about the half siblings.

So this is where I should say that I’m pretty indifferent to the babies.

I know they’re technically my half siblings. But I don’t really feel anything toward them.

Honestly it makes me sad that I was the only kid my parents had together because I think it would have been nice to have someone who’s been there with me through my parents relationship breaking down, dad dying and mom remarrying and starting a family with Harvey.

But I just don’t see my half siblings the way I imagine seeing a full sibling, because we only share one parent, because I’m so much older and because our experiences will always be so different.

I don’t hate them. But I can’t honestly say I love them.

Her mom found out how she really felt.

During the party for the babies I got kind of tired of faking being happy and enthusiastic about it so I went upstairs for a while and was talking to my best friend.

Apparently my mom overheard and she talked to Harvey afterward and was devastated because she has realized I don’t feel all warm and fuzzy about the babies and I’m not really happy to have half siblings. She realized I do see them as half and that hurt her a lot because she assumed I would see them as simply siblings.

Harvey told me what mom found out and he told me to lie my butt off so mom will think she misunderstood and will go back to being happy.

When I said no he told me I’m being so selfish.

AITA?

Harvey is wrong for telling her to lie. Her feelings are valid, and honestly, what’s wrong with seeing them as half siblings? That’s what they are!

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

Lying is not the answer.

Her stepdad shouldn’t have told her to lie.

Everyone seems to agree that the stepdad gave her really bad advice.

This person suggests therapy.

This person doesn’t think therapy will help.

She will never feel the way her mom wants her to feel.

If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.