Growing up and moving out doesn’t mean that you are free from drama with your mom. It can be even harder when your parents are seniors.

See why this woman and her husband are deep in the throes of a guilt trip.

AITA for moving away from my parents?

I’m from a pretty close family. I lived at home with my parents and brother until I met my future husband at the age of 29.

Technically we went through 2020 together, but only officially moved in with him when I was 30.

She feels good about the new arrangement.

He bought a house about 30 minutes away from my parents without traffic and the longest it has been is about 90 minutes with traffic. My adult brother still lives with them.

Recently, we were given an opportunity to buy the house of a deceased relative at a nice discount, but the house is about 3 hours total from where my parents are.

I acknowledge that my parents are unable to make the trip to see me, but I am happy to come to them and always have been.

My mother, since I’ve told her and disclosed that we are also having trouble getting pregnant and that I am getting fertility treatments, and that I am clinically depressed and in therapy, has completely broken down.

But her mom sees it much differently.

She has said that she thought she raised me differently, that she’ll never see us, that I won’t be here for my father, who isn’t well and has a lot of medical issues.

I have countered with that now that I work fully from home, I can literally come and stay if she needs me to help out, but she never asks me to.

Today, we had it out while we were cooking (Thanksgiving) and she said she didn’t want anything from me, that my husband doesn’t care about the distance, and that it’s just not how she imagined our relationship, especially with a kid.

I said it’s not how I imagined it either but that this is a good opportunity for us.

Their rationale make no sense to her.

I should note that where they live is literally one of the most expensive cities in the country and that they live paycheck to paycheck and have for a long time.

My husband’s job means that we can’t just pick any random place to live as he brings in most of the money, and I don’t think it’s fair that he’d have to get a new job to make her happy.

I guess right now I just feel trapped. Will this get better?

AITA for wanting to move further away even though my dad isn’t doing well and I’d be further from my parents?

Here is what folks are saying.

Very. Classic codependence.

Manipulative indeed!

Why do the women always have to do it all?

Yeah I don’t know what her mom is on about.

Exactly. I bet they’ll say they want to be near a major hospital.

She should move farther away.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.