Their New Neighbors Asked For Help With Their Kids—And They Had To Set A Boundary
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Being friendly with new neighbors is one thing, but sharing childcare requires a level of trust that usually takes time to build.
Picture someone you barely know suggesting that your families start watching each other’s children – would you consider the arrangement, or politely decline before it became an expectation?
That unexpected proposal in this one leaves one organized parent wondering whether saying no was sensible or unnecessarily unfriendly.
Let’s check it out.
AITA??? Childcare for neighbour we barely know
So a family moved in around 6 months ago and seem quite nice. They have 2 kids, we have a 9-year-old son.
Kids, man, and woman always say hello and are very polite. They said when they settle they would like to invite us round for dinner (hasn’t happened, but kind to say).
We know their names and say hello in passing, and I’ve even sent his CV/resume to my workplace when he was looking for work.
But then one day, things started to go south.
So yesterday he knocks round and says could we discuss childcare options with each other, as we as parents all work and may need extra help, so we may need them to have our son occasionally and we could have their children round.
We are both full-time workers but incredibly organized, so have all childcare booked and planned until October.
The request didn’t sit well with her.
I felt I wanted to be neighbourly and say yes of course, BUT also hesitant, as I don’t want to be saddled with kids I barely know all the time and know for sure we simply don’t need extra help.
Now she’s second-guessing if she made the right call.
Should I have given it more time before I said, “That’s kind of you to consider us but we are genuinely ok! Thanks!”
Feel like I may have dismissed him? AITA???
She didn’t mean to come off as rude, but they just truly didn’t need the help.
What did Reddit think?
This user doesn’t think anyone as at fault.
The request doesn’t sit well at all with this reader.
This commenter worries a pattern is emerging.
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If she’s not happy with the interaction, there’s still time to adjust course.
If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a student who did the math and figured out he was better off skipping school than serving detention if he forgot his ID.
This story shows that being neighborly does not require agreeing to every favor someone proposes.
Getting to know each other through dinners or playdates might have made a future childcare arrangement feel safer, but committing immediately would have been a major leap of trust.
Maybe the neighbor was genuinely hoping to create a helpful support system, although the parent was still perfectly reasonable to decline something they did not need.
Sometimes the best way to remain friendly with the people next door is to avoid becoming their unpaid daycare in the first place.
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