Is it wise to set financial goals before having kids, or is it better to not worry about money and just have kids because you want to?

In this story, one woman doesn’t want to raise her children in poverty, so she has set financial goals for herself and a future partner before she’d be ready to have kids. The problem is that a guy who has a crush on her found out about her goals, and let’s just say he didn’t have the reaction she’d hoped for.

Let’s read all about it.

AITAH for telling a guy he doesn’t make enough money?

I’m 50/50 on having kids.

The biggest factor is income.

My family struggled so much growing up. As a result I have very high financial goals before Id even consider having a child.

Here are her goals.

My goal is $150k salary for myself AND at least $150k for my partner before I even consider a child and ideally 30k in savings.

I do not make that now but this income is doable given my career choice.

But if it doesnt happen… I simply won’t have kids. And that’s okay with me.

I’m interested in settling down in the next 5yrs and kids in 8 or so. I’ve started dating with intention.

She knows there’s a guy who wants to date her.

There’s a guy in this org i’m in who has a crush on me. He’s funny and sweet and kind.

We are not official and I know he wants to take me on a date. He’s also taking dating seriously and we’ve spoken enough that I could see something arising.

I know he wants kids soon.

He hosts hiking events for some outdoor company so kids wouldn’t be in our future if it got that far.

He doesn’t agree with her goals.

We were chatting with a group of friends where I shared my financial goals.

He kept pushing back and later blew up saying it was a problematic take and that I’m being unrealistic. He said that I just want a man to provide for me and I’m doing “sprinkle sprinkle” misandry.

One of his female friends jumped in and she said it’s also wrong and that i’m privileged.

I guess he no longer likes her.

Now he has blocked me when I tried to talk to him afterwards.

Considering we haven’t even gone on a date yet, I think he’s jumping the gun.

I don’t plan on being a SAHM and the income requirements are equal.

But AITA?

They’re not compatible. She needs to find someone who doesn’t think her goals are unrealistic.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this story.

One person thinks she needs to increase her savings goal.

Another person thinks she needs to consider more than just money.

I’m not sure she was judging him. She just didn’t see kids as a possibility with him.

This person flips the situation to show her his perspective.

Money isn’t everything, but it helps.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who isn’t sure she wants a sibling relationship with a biological sister she didn’t grow up with.