Jointly owning a property with your father can seem like a good idea, but all too often it ends up just causing a lot of drama.

What would you do if you and your dad inherited a home, but he wouldn’t let you move into it, and he even took a loan out on its value without telling you?

That is what happened to the young woman in this story, so rather than letting the house sit empty, she is thinking about moving in for a while without telling him. She just doesn’t want to cause more conflict than is already there.

Personally, I think she should move in if she wants. Keep reading to see what you think she should do.

AITA for moving back into my family home without informing my dad?

So, when I was fresh out of high school, my grandparents transferred their ownership of my family home to me, and I’ve had 50/50 ownership with my dad ever since.

I moved out not long after because of friction between me and my dad’s new family.

A few years ago, my dad moved out of state with his new family, and since then the house has largely been unoccupied, sans occasional trips they make back to my home state.

She really shouldn’t have to ask permission since the house is half hers.

Since they’ve left, I’ve asked twice if I could move back into it.

The first time was because my home had a pipe burst and my partner and I needed a place to stay while repairs were ongoing.

The second time was this year, as I wanted to start saving money to invest into my own business.

He seems to think he is entitled to more than half the control over the house.

Both times I was stonewalled, with him citing things like how he and his new family ”put a lot of money into the house” and “wanted to make sure it wasn’t taken for granted”.

That second remark frankly annoyed the heck out of me, and it’s something that’s been a sore sticking point for me for months.

This is unacceptable. She needs to either buy out his half or sell her half to him.

My annoyance with that point got even stronger when I found out that HE ALMOST LET THE HOUSE GO INTO FORECLOSURE LAST YEAR WITHOUT TELLING ME.

He’d taken a loan out on the house some time ago, and apparently he’d defaulted and the house was almost foreclosed before a last minute payment could be made.

It took me pulling the property records for me to learn about that.

In the year since the default happened, he never brought it up, never reached out to me to discuss it, nothing.

It is her house; she can certainly do this.

So, here’s where I may be in the wrong: I’m in the process of moving into a new home with my partner, but there’s a 3 week gap between her lease ending and our new lease starting.

My lease is still ongoing until July, but my family home is closer to both of our workplaces than my current townhouse.

So, after explaining everything to my partner, we decided to stay in my family home for these 3 weeks regardless of what my dad said.

I don’t see why she is worried about what he thinks at all.

Legally speaking, I know I’m in the clear. I consulted an attorney that specializes in property disputes, and she told me that since I own it.

I could‘ve called a locksmith and moved back in at any time, and I’ve got her on retainer in case my dad or his family do anything.

Morally speaking I’m still unsure. I’m honestly just frustrated that my dad’s gate kept me from using the family home and completely withheld the fact that the house was at risk of foreclosure because he was missing payments on a loan he took out, but I’m also aware I may be behaving irrationally.

My partner thinks he’s out of line and I should’ve done this years ago, but I’m still unsure.

AITA?

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a man whose celebratory post-grad school vacation is being ruined by his family’s insistence he’s being lazy.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this situation.

She should set up another meeting with the lawyer and see what her next move may be.

How did he even get a loan without her signature?

This person wonders why she hasn’t sold the house yet.

It is her house too. She should move right in.

It is time to force a sale of the property.

This is a nightmare situation that is only going to get worse if she doesn’t deal with it head-on. She needs to either sell her half or force him to sell his half, right away. If she doesn’t, things are only going to get worse.

It seems clear that the dad doesn’t respect his daughter as a real co-owner, so there is no reason to listen to what he wants to happen. She should talk to her lawyer and do what they advise.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a young woman who struggles with her new reality after learning her adoption story was a lie.