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Grandparents are allowed to have opinions about family traditions. They may even have very strong opinions about them. But once your disagreement over a baby’s dedication reaches your adult son’s boss, things may have traveled a little beyond friendly family input.

One 33-year-old father and his wife recently welcomed their second child and are preparing for his dedication, a common Christian practice where they live. Traditionally, children at their church are dedicated during Sunday services, but the couple wanted something smaller.

Instead, they arranged to have the ceremony during a weekday evening service with just family and a few guests. Their church approved the plan, and similar weekday dedications have apparently happened at other branches, although theirs would be the first at this particular parish.

There is, however, one person who absolutely does not approve: Grandma.

As a founding member of the church, she believes her grandson deserves the traditional Sunday ceremony. And when her son refused to change the date, she didn’t simply express her disappointment.

She started recruiting reinforcements.

AITA for refusing to change the dedication date of my son

I 33m and married to my 28f since 2022, we just had our 2nd child in April and in line with the common Christian practice of our environment, we are to dedicate the child in about 3 months.

However, instead of dedicating our child on Sunday as is traditional, we have decided to keep it small and do it on a weekday with only our family and a few guests and this has been permitted/ approved by our church especially in light of the general decline of the economy of my country

My mother is strongly of the opinion that despite the church’s approval, we should dedicate our child on Sunday.

Very specific.

When I asked why she has stated as follows:

That we are hiding the child and doing the dedication at night. ( it’s an evening service byw 4pm – 6pm)

She is a founding member of the church, and her grandchild’s dedication shouldn’t be hidden.

That I will be the dirst to do it in my church and set a precedent (true, I’ll be the first in my parish, but it has been done is several other branches of the church).

Fair points.

I have stated it is a decision made by me and my wife, and while she has her objections, we see no reason to change it.

My mum has been calling everyone, my uncle’s, my in-laws, my boss, and crying the phone trying to get me to change my mind.

I don’t think I’m wrong, but everybody is of the opinion that I should do what she wants to stop her crying as I’m her only surviving son.

Oof.

I see no reason to change my plans, but with the pressure from everyone at my mum’s instigation,

I feel compelled to ask internet strangers…

AITA, for not refusing to change the planned day for the dedication of my son?

Commenters largely sided with the parents. Grandma’s disappointment isn’t necessarily unreasonable—particularly if she’s a founding member of the church and a Sunday dedication carries significant meaning to her. She may genuinely see this as an important family and religious tradition rather than simply a scheduling preference.

But the child’s parents still get to make the decision.

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They aren’t refusing to dedicate their son, excluding Grandma, or secretly inventing their own ceremony. They discussed an alternative with their church, received approval, and chose something that better suits their circumstances. The fact that it’s unusual in their parish doesn’t make it improper, especially when other branches have already done the same.

Where Grandma’s reaction becomes much harder to defend is the campaign to overrule them. Calling relatives and in-laws is one thing; contacting her adult son’s boss while crying about his baby’s dedication date takes the disagreement somewhere it never needed to go.

Giving in may stop the phone calls this time, but it could also teach everyone involved that enough pressure can override the parents’ decisions.

This person has a lot of questions.

This person says Mom’s opinions don’t matter here.

And this person says your kid = your choice. Period.

Once Grandma is calling your boss about the baby’s church schedule, the dedication date may no longer be the family’s biggest boundary issue.

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Author

Diana Whelan

Diana Whelan | Contributing Writer, Life & Drama

Diana Whelan is a contributing writer for TwistedSifter specializing in family dynamics, viral internet culture, and interpersonal relationships. Drawing on her extensive professional background as a senior copywriter in the digital marketing space, Diana excels at transforming community-driven conversations and trending social media debates into relatable, highly engaging narratives.

Rather than simply aggregating online drama, Diana brings a balanced, humorous, and empathetic editorial voice to everyday dilemmas and parenting moments. She has a keen eye for finding the human element at the center of complex relationship conflicts and viral social trends.

Outside of writing, Diana is usually spending time with her husband and two kids, planning elaborate themed parties, or chasing down new family adventures. Fueled by a little too much caffeine and a love for a well-placed pun, she can often be found unwinding with a glass of wine and her very patient golden retriever.

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