She Was Happy To Reconnect With An Old Friend Over Lunch, But A Simple Scoop Of Soup Sparked Accusations Of Being Low Class
by Diana Whelan
Reconnecting with an old friend over a fancy buffet sounds like a recipe for a great time.
But when one slip-up at the soup station left her friend appalled, this woman started questioning her etiquette—and her friendship.
Did she really commit a buffet faux pas, or is her friend just overreacting?
Read on for the story.
AITA for my behaviour at a buffet?
Hi everyone, I (28F) recently reconnected with a friend (27F) from high school. Let’s name her “Brenna.”
We were really close (like, think inseparable) but the distance after we moved away inevitably caused our friendship to dwindle.
I recently moved to her city with my husband and it was like nothing had changed.
After a few 1 on 1 lunches, she wanted to introduce me to some of her other friends from uni. We decided on an upscale buffet at a hotel.
Fancy shmancy.
I think it’s relevant to include that the university she went to was known for its extremely wealthy and privileged students.
Coming from an upper-middle class background, I wasn’t really sure what to expect or what we’d have to connect on, but she assured me it’d be okay and that everyone was really “down to earth.”
I got along with everyone really well. The conversations were engaging and we all bounced off of each other really nicely with the banter.
She booked it on a Monday afternoon so it’d be (relatively) less crowded, so none of us would have trouble communicating.
But here is where I think everything went wrong: There was a short queue behind me (3 people, all in our party, one of whom included Brenna) while I was trying to scoop a stew for myself.
It was a minestrone and I had accidentally grabbed a scoopful of vegetables instead of soup.
So on my second scoop, I decided to do the opposite so that I could get a balance of both (my first scoop hardly contained any soup).
This doesn’t sound like something that went wrong.
I stopped after two scoops and turned to see Brenna staring at me with an appalled expression.
I was really puzzled but I kept on walking back to our table so I wasn’t blocking anyone’s way, and I figured I should ask her about it later.
The rest of the lunch, I noticed Brenna acting really strange. She was limiting her interactions with me, avoiding eye contact with me, etc.
Another friend (28M) even asked her about this and she dismissed the question (she said “I don’t know what you’re talking about”).
After we all said goodbye, I got a series of texts from Brenna saying how disgustingly “low class” I acted in front of her friends.
I asked her what she meant and she referred to how I selectively scooped the minestrone in front of her and how “it’s extremely poor etiquette to pick and choose portions at a buffet.”
Excuse me???
I tried explaining to her it was an accident, and I hadn’t intentionally tried to do what she was explaining but she said I was still “holding up the line.” I apologized for that and she hasn’t responded since.
I apologized to the 2 other people that were waiting behind me but they didn’t know what I was talking about. I explained to them what Brenna saw and they said she’s being a “pompous jerk” and told me to forget about it.
Now I have no idea what to feel because I initially felt extremely guilty when Brenna confronted me but hearing these 2 say it’s no big deal is really making me wonder. I would love some other opinions.
Geez.
Is the friendship doomed over a ladle of minestrone, or is someone just stirring the pot?
This commenter on Reddit says it’s the latter.
This person concurs.
This person also blames Brenna.
Who knew a bowl of soup could lead to such a cold shoulder?
This is one bizarre post if you ask me.
If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.
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