As a parent, you want to help your children as much as possible, but sometimes that means letting them grow up and make their own decisions.

What would you do if you were living with your mother while you went to college, but she kept giving you a really hard time for spending your own money on things like fast food?

That is what is happening to the young lady in this story, and she feels like she should be able to spend her money on whatever she wants.

To me, it seems like the daughter is being very responsible, and her mom needs to back off. Read through the full story below and see if you agree.

AITA for spending my money on what I want? 18F

Hi there! I’m 18, F, in college, and currently live with my mom for the next year until I transfer to my dream school.

Mom is being overbearing.

I’ve made some friends, and we go out to eat often, but my mom doesn’t like the idea because she thinks I’ll spend too much money or gain a lot of weight. (I have never been overweight my entire life).

Recently, I have been going to Starbucks real early in the morning with my friends to go study, and everytime I mention that, she gets angry, ask who, when, why, and how. Not like in a concerned parent way but in a different way. (I have A’s in both my summer classes right now and I got a 94 on my midterm)

She needs to set some boundaries with her mother.

But, this week we’ve been going to Chick-fil-A and Starbucks, and I recently spent 5 dollars on a game on the appstore (Incredibox) because I thought it was fun.

I’m gonna be honest, I knew that when I bought that game, my mom would get mad. But I asked myself, it’s my money after all, and its just 5 dollars. 500 pennies. So, what’s the big deal? Wrong idea.

It is past time for an honest conversation with her mom.

This morning she and I were haggling because I didn’t want to eat breakfast (eating when I just wake up makes me sick, and I don’t like it) and she started talking about how I want to eat at Starbucks but not a home.

In the past 4 or 5 weeks, we have gone to Starbucks 3 times. Then she was saying how I probably eat out without telling her and eat the lunch from home in the car or throw it away.

Which isn’t true. I told her to check my bank statements, (she has them on her phone since I took out my debit card a few years ago).

Maybe she needs to get her own private accounts set up.

Ovbiously, I wasn’t doing what she thought, but she started reading out every transaction. Like she would say, what did you spend 1.94 on at Chick-fil-A. Or what did you buy with 13.35 at Starbucks?

Like, what do you think? Food and drink. Then what really took the cake was when she saw the purchase of 5 dollars and weirdly 24 cents too, but separate.

Mom has no right to take her money.

Once I saw the look on her face I knew I was done for. She flipped out, saying why would I spend 5 dollars on that. I told her because I wanted to, and it’s my hard-earned money, and I should get to spend it on what I want. I did not talk to her in a bad manner.

She got even angrier and made me give her my debit card, I hope she doesn’t take all the money out of my accounts. She’s done that before.

Sure, Mom might just be concerned. But she is handling it improperly.

And I get where she’s coming from, honestly. She doesn’t want me to spend all my money, and I’m not. I have some thousands in a CD, some in my savings and also in my checking.

I’m not going to go broke by buying drinks from restaurants a couple of time a week or buying a 5 dollar game.

It most certainly is not right for her to take the card.

This is only because I’m in summer classes, with the group of friends. I just don’t think it’s right for her to take my card, nor is it safe.

You never know when you need money and not every place takes tap to pay.

She has every reason to be tired of this treatment.

And on the way out of the house this morning she was yelling at me from the porch as I got in my car.

I’m just tired of her always freaking out when I want to buy something small when it’s MY money.

AITA??

Mom is having a very difficult time letting her daughter grow up. While it might be somewhat understandable, it is not excusable. She has her daughter’s best interests in mind, but it is actually hurting her in the long run.

Read on to see what the people in the comments have to say about this situation.

Mom is being too controlling.

These are some good questions.

This commenter makes some good points.

Why did she give her the card at all?

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a man who had to sprint to the bathroom the moment he got home, then emerged to find his partner upset he didn’t greet her properly.

This commenter says she should cancel her account and set up a new one.

She needs to establish some boundaries with her mother. The situation that they are in is really unsustainable.

Hopefully, they can just have a frank conversation and move past this issue.