Moving to a new state is always a difficult decision, but when you are a child, you don’t usually get a choice in the matter.

What would you do if your mom made you move years ago, but now that you are 18 you want to move back?

That is the situation the daughter in this story is in, and her mom is angry that she wants to leave her.

Check it out.

AITA for agreeing when my mom told me I’m not even trying to make this my new home and telling her I just want to go home?

I (17f) moved states with my mom, her husband and his kids when I was 13.

My mom’s husband got a job offer in his home town and he wanted to be near his family and mom okayed it.

This took us away from my family and the people I lived with for 11 years.

Because before my mom moved in with her husband we lived with her parents as in my grandparents.

I never met my dad so for me my core family was my mom and my grandparents.

I had two aunts and an uncle and their spouses and kids all living within 15 minutes from our old house too.

The move was great for my mom’s step kids.

I can see how this would be good for them.

They got to be close by their families (their dad’s side and their mom’s).

Their mom died so it was emphasized that it would be extra special and important for them.

They always wanted to go back home.

Because this was always home to them.

But to me? My home is where we moved from.

When we were first told about the move I said straight up that I didn’t want to leave my family behind and my mom told me I wasn’t because we were all moving together.

I didn’t see the stepfamily as my family though.

To me my family are still mom and everyone back home but especially my grandparents.

Her husband has tried to fill the role of my dad but my grandpa and my uncle already filled in the fatherly figure role for me.

And I’ll admit the fact he took me away from my family to be near his also makes me less open to being close to him.

I had no choice in the move so I went with them but I always saw this as temporary for me and I would move back home as soon as I could.

My mom has tried to make this my home.

She put me in extra curricular activities, she let me do stuff I was never allowed to do back home and she tried to use things to make me love it here.

This must have been a very hard move.

But I hated every second of being here and now that I’m 7 months away from being able to move home again, it’s all I can really think about.

I’ve spoken to my grandparents about moving back in with them when I can and they’re on board and they’re excited to have me back.

We were talking about some of the logistics of it when mom came home and heard some of my side of that discussion.

She got upset and asked me why I’m already planning on leaving and I told her that I always wanted to.

She told me she wanted to strangle me (not in the literal sense of killing me but you know) because we had so much going for us where we are now and I can’t see it.

She told me I could’ve used the move to get everything I wanted and it would have worked.

Then she said I’m not even trying to make this place home and I agreed with her.

I told her I never wanted the move and for me home isn’t about the stuff but the people and I left most of my family behind when we moved.

And I just want to go home now and I’ve always just wanted to go home.

She acted like I slapped her.

I’m sure she is hurt.

She told me she knew I considered her my family but to say I left most when I had her husband and his kids here meant I didn’t even count them and she said it’s been 6 years since we all started living together so that was a hard thing to hear.

She told me she couldn’t understand me and that most teenagers wouldn’t give a crap about the people they left and they’d kill for the stuff they gave me since we moved.

She also said her husband would be really gut punched to realize while he’s been bonding with me and seeing me as his daughter I only ever saw him as the guy who made me move.

She said I was totally selfish and didn’t even love her enough to accept this because she loves me and she loves him and his kids.

AITA?

These two need to have a conversation about what is best for everyone, even if that means her moving back to her grandparents.

Read on to see what the people in the comments say.

This is exactly right.

This person says the reasons were the same for her step-siblings.

She sounds very mature.

Yes, this is classic manipulation.

Mom is being selfish.

She’s an adult and can leave if she wants.

End of story.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.