Deciding where to send your kids to school can be difficult, especially when you have multiple kids to think about.

What would you do if you and your wife decided to send your kids to private school, but you had another daughter with an ex who couldn’t help to contribute to sending her to a private school as well?

That is the difficult situation that the guy in this story is in, so he told his ex that their daughter would have to go to a public school since he can’t really afford to pay for it all himself. Now both she and their daughter are upset.

This is a difficult situation, to be sure. If he truly can’t afford it, that is understandable, but it seems like he actually can. Read through the details below and see what you think.

AITA? My baby mama wants our daughter to go to private school but I just can’t afford it

I have a 14 year old daughter with my ex girlfriend. We have split custody but her primary residence is with her mum since we live in separate cities (just an hour).

A private school can be great for many families.

My wife and I have our own little girls who are 7 years old and 10 months and a son who’s 4 (I swear I’m done lol).

After long discussions and preparations with our finances we decided we wanted our daughter to go to private school.

So, he can afford it for some children but not others?

As soon as my bm heard she went ballistic because she’s been wanting my eldest daughter to go to private school since forever and my daughter has also been asking to go.

It’s not that I don’t want her to more than I know I can’t afford that burden.

I suppose that does make sense, two people contributing rather than one.

It’s easier with my wife because we both work and have good jobs but my ex works at a salon so most of it will be coming out of my pocket and that’s just not sustainable without giving up a lot of comforts and changing our lifestyle more than preferred.

My bm is trashing me over it and my daughter has been airing me since I told her I couldn’t afford it. I don’t even know what to do anymore.

Private school can certainly be expensive.

BM can’t afford it. This isn’t an assumption. This is something I know because I know their finances and often help her out.

She knows she can’t pay half. We spoken about it.

AITA?

The kids aren’t going to go to the same school, regardless, because they live so far apart. That being said, if he is willing to pay for his younger children to go to private school, he should do the same for his eldest.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a young woman who struggles with her new reality after learning her adoption story was a lie.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about this situation.

He should talk to his ex before making a decision.

This person says there is no need to send any of the kids to private school.

There are options available. He just isn’t pursuing them.

Giving up some comforts is what you do for children.

His eldest would likely be resentful.

It doesn’t seem like he put much effort into figuring out a way to make this work. Maybe his ex could help a little, and they could cut back on some luxuries. The school might even have some scholarships or something.

While he isn’t obligated to send all the kids to the exact same type of school, there are certainly things he could do to make it work. He just isn’t putting in the effort.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a professor who missed a major funding deadline after they told their graduate student to leave them alone.