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Personal boundaries can be hard to enforce, even with family.

In this story, a woman asked her mom to stop calling her pretty because it made her uncomfortable.

Despite telling this to her mom multiple times, her mom brushed off the request and continued doing so.

The disagreement quickly escalated and turned the simple compliment into a complicated mess.

Check out the full details below.

AITAH for telling my mother to stop calling me pretty/beautiful etc?

I am going to start with the facts. I was born female.

In the past years, I do not like being feminine.

I have a more male-ish haircut.

I do not wear skirts, tops, or clothing that is more feminine in general.

You can still tell I am female, though.

This woman’s mother kept calling her pretty and beautiful.

My mom always likes to remind me how much she loves me.

One of her love languages is telling me I look pretty and beautiful.

She says this even when I look messy.

Today, she forwarded me some pictures.

We took them with our friends a few days ago.

She got irritated.

I jokingly said, “I do not look very good in these pictures as usual 😂.”

She said I look beautiful and that it is fine. I got a little irritated.

I told her we already talked about this several times.

That I do not like her always calling me beautiful and pretty.

For context, I asked her several times before to not call me pretty or beautiful.

I do not like it. She could just say I look good, great, or fine. That is neutral but means the same.

They argued over texts.

We got into an argument over texts. She said she is my mother.

And I have to accept that she will not stop saying it when she feels like it.

I got a little tense. I told her she is not respecting the two things I asked for.

I said it is for my own comfort, and not about her.

We got to a point where she brought up my father.

Her mom told her she would start treating her like her father instead.

She asked if she should behave like my father.

She said he always criticizes everything about my looks, my piercing, my clothes, and my hair.

She asked if she should just not show her love towards me in general.

I told her that is not what I am asking from her.

Just because she is my mother does not mean she can do anything.

I said she should not do things I am not comfortable with for her own comfort.

She felt disrespected.

I feel like I am being disrespected. I know she is trying to show her endless love for me.

She knows I am not the lovey-dovey type of person.

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I only had two boundaries for her:

Do not come into my room, or at least knock beforehand.

Do not call me pretty or beautiful.

So far, none of these two have been respected. AITA?

Wow, that’s frustrating! I mean, that was a simple request, but her mother just wouldn’t give in.

Love doesn’t mean ignoring boundaries. It should be about respect and compromise.

I understand how mothers appreciate and admire their daughters, but I think there are other ways to show their love.

Don’t you think so, too? Let’s see how others reacted to this story.

This user gives their honest opinion.

This one shares their personal thoughts.

Here’s a valid point from this person.

This one has a question.

Finally, your mom loves you, says this user.

Apparently, even compliments need consent sometimes.

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Author

Heide Lazaro

Heide Lazaro is a veteran human-interest writer and digital culture expert with over a decade of experience in editorial strategy. Specializing in lifestyle, social dynamics, and the internet's most compelling stories, Heide has authored and published more than 10 books online. Beyond her daily reporting, she is a dedicated motivational speaker who helps audiences connect through the power of storytelling. When she isn't sifting through the web's wildest real-life drama, Heide is an avid runner, painter, and novel-enthusiast fueled by a truly excellent cup of coffee.