A Cashier Complimented His Nails—But Then the Conversation Took a Wild Turn
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There are some things you just don’t expect to hear from a stranger while buying a soda.
One grocery store customer learned that as a teenager after a cashier grabbed his hand to admire his long, pointed nails.
When she asked how he kept them so strong, he guessed that drinking a lot of milk might have something to do with it.
That answer sent the cashier into a very detailed explanation of why milk definitely didn’t work for her.
And from there, the conversation only got more personal.
Read on to see how it all happened.
TMI from a cashier
When I was 16, I was in a metal band. I wore a leather jacket with spikes and chains on it. I had long hair. I took an additional step to look “metal” as well: I grew my nails out and filed them to points, so it looked like I had claws. Man, I thought I looked ******.
Just so they didn’t break, I did some basic grooming steps on them. I’d file them daily. I’d use a nail buffer on them. With a minimum of effort, my nails generally looked like I’d gotten a fresh manicure.
One day, I walk into a grocery store to grab a soda. I’m metaled-out, leather jacket, sharp nails, as usual. I take my soda to the register.
Suddenly, she grabbed his hand.
The cashier rings it up and tells me the total. I reach out to hand her a couple of bucks when she straight-up snatches my hand to her face. She pulls so hard, I’m leaning over the conveyor belt! She starts pressing on my nails, putting the pads of her fingers down on the sharp points.
Before I get a chance to say anything, she says, “BABY. OH MY GOD, BAYYYBY. Your nails are gorgeous. How did you get them to be so nice and strong?”
She lets go of my hand, but I freeze up. I mean, how do you respond to somebody who just did that? The only thing I can think of is to tell her, “I don’t know—I guess it’s because I drink a lot of milk?”
Then, things got pretty uncomfortable.
I say that, and her eyes get wide. She says, “Milk? MILK?!? Aw, baby, naw, I can’t be doing all of that. Milk makes me poot and doo-doo too much. Shoo-whee!”
I’m just like… Wat.
So I say something to the effect of, “Well, that sucks.” Now I just want to get out of this store and drink my soda.
But she continues, “Baby, I ain’t playing! If I drink milk, you don’t want to go in the bathroom for an hour after I get out. And I’ll be in there a while, whoo LAWD! I’m liable to smash that toilet, baby! If I did that here, I’d probably get fired for gassing the whole store out, LAWD!”
She even kept the conversation going when the next customer stepped to the counter.
…Meanwhile, I’m just standing there gob smacked that this lady is sharing her lactose intolerance with such a level of gory detail.
I get a break in the conversation, and I tell her I better get going. As I leave, though, I hear her saying something to another customer like, “Did you see that boys’ nails? They were gorgeous, and he got them from drinking a lot of milk. WHOOO LAWD, milk. If I drank milk right now, I’d be pooping EVERYWHERE!”
That was over 20 years ago, and I can’t really say I’ve had that lively of a conversation with a grocery cashier since. She’s certainly the only one I’ve ever encountered whose description of her lactose intolerance is burned into my synapses.
Oh wow! She definitely didn’t care about what anyone else thought.
Let’s see if the readers over at Reddit know anyone who acts like this in public.
That’s definitely what it is.
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That’s enough to give anyone nightmares.
That would be terrible.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about an employee who got back at slacking coworkers with fresh-baked treats.
Well, probably because he said long, pointy nails.
The cashier sure didn’t have a filter.
The whole thing started out innocently enough, but then the conversation went somewhere few people would’ve seen coming.
At least she was just being friendly and clearly loved his nails.
But still, that’s pretty gross and some shocking talk for just about anyone to encounter.
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