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Gift-giving can be a thoughtful way to show family members how much they mean to you.

The following story is about a woman who had been giving her husband’s two nieces thoughtful goody bags whenever they visited them.

The bags often contain cosmetics and other body care products.

Her husband suggested they start bringing four bags instead of two for his SIL’s partner’s daughters too.

But she refused and said she didn’t want to prepare extra goody bags for two girls she had never met.

Hmmm… That sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? Let’s take a closer look!

AITA? Don’t want to buy goody bags for girls I’ve never met

My husband and I have been together for 10 years.

I have two nieces through his sister, ages 14 and 9.

Every time we visit them, we bring them little goody bags.

(Our visits were very infrequent because they are in another country on the other side of the world.)

This woman’s husband wanted to get 4 goody bags now.

The bags contain Trader Joe’s totes, cosmetics, lotions, etc.

They love these bags, and it brings me great joy to do this for them.

The last time my husband went to visit, he went alone.

When he came back, he told me we’re going to need to start bringing 4 goody bags.

She said she didn’t want to put any effort into preparing gifts for girls she didn’t know.

My SIL has been seriously dating a man who has 2 daughters, and he brought his daughters to the family dinner.

My husband said it was kind of awkward.

The nieces were opening their goody bags in front of them while they were empty-handed.

I told my husband I’m not putting time, thought, money, and effort into two girls I have no connection to.

I have never met them, and I don’t consider them as part of the family.

She also told him to talk to his SIL and his nieces about this concern.

I also told him he should be arranging a private meeting with his SIL and nieces.

Where they won’t be present if that’s an issue.

He kind of thinks I’m the jerk.

I can see where he’s coming from, as we have a son ourselves, but I disagree.

AITA?

I think OP has a valid point in wanting to keep the tradition special for her husband’s nieces only.

While it may feel awkward for the two other girls, they’re not really responsible for getting them anything.

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A goody bag with cosmetics and lotions is not cheap either.

I agree that her husband needs to talk to his sister-in-law and raise this concern with her.

Let’s check out the comments of other people on this story.

Here’s a quick suggestion.

This person gives their honest opinion.

Here’s a valid point.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a bride who invites her groom’s “best woman” out to dinner in order to get to the bottom of her true feelings for her future husband.

Have a heart, says this one.

Finally, this one calls out OP.

Sometimes, a little gift bag can come with a surprisingly big family debate!

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Author

Heide Lazaro

Heide Lazaro is a veteran human-interest writer and digital culture expert with over a decade of experience in editorial strategy. Specializing in lifestyle, social dynamics, and the internet's most compelling stories, Heide has authored and published more than 10 books online. Beyond her daily reporting, she is a dedicated motivational speaker who helps audiences connect through the power of storytelling. When she isn't sifting through the web's wildest real-life drama, Heide is an avid runner, painter, and novel-enthusiast fueled by a truly excellent cup of coffee.