It’s hard to really know another person, no matter how long they’ve been in your life. It’s the reason many folks want to see someone for a long time before deciding to live together or get married, but honestly, that doesn’t always work.

OP has been seeing her boyfriend for a couple of years. They do not live together because OP is being cautious, given they both have children.

I’ve been seeing “Jack” for 2 years now but we live separately due to the kids and just wanting to make sure this is 100% all in before uprooting them.

I have 2 sons (13yo twins) and 1 daughter (11). He has 1 daughter (13).

We do weekend stays together twice a month so far and there’s never been any major issues honestly. The girls have gotten in to a few petty arguments but other than that, no big problems.

They do spend a couple of weeks a month together (in her beach house) and even considering the extra mouths for a couple days a month, her grocery bill is around $1k.

I spend around $1000 a month in food and that covers me and my kids + Jack and his daughter for the two visits a month.

I do a lot of meal prep and couponing.

When OP and her kids planned to go out of town, she asked her boyfriend if he and his daughter would want to housesit. All she expected in return was for them to empty her dehumidifier and she told them they were welcome to eat some of the food she had in the house.

Last month my mother asked me and my kids to go to her place in Louisiana to help her move out of her home and into a 50+ community.

It made me feel more comfortable to have my house occupied in my absence to keep the dehumidifiers and everything running (huge moisture issues and I don’t want anything to mold or rust) so I asked Jack if he and his daughter wanted to stay at my place for 2 weeks in our absence to keep everything running smoothly.

I gave it a 2 week time frame but was unsure of how long it would actually take. I knew the drive alone would be 2 days there and 2 days back. He agreed.

I did my monthly shop before leaving and spent $1,092. I told them they could have some of my food when we were gone so maybe this is my fault.

OP was gone for about 10 days and came home to a destroyed house and almost all of the food gone.

But anyways, we got back 2 days ago (4 days before the 2 week mark) and found my house in ruin, practically. Dirty dishes on the counters and table, dirty clothes throughout the living room and bedrooms (mine and my daughters- where they slept).

I keep my house clean so this caused a lot of panic on my end (grew up in a hoarder house so I take pride in a clean home).

But the one thing that truly tipped me over the edge was finding that they went through at least 90% of the food I bought before leaving, in less than 2 weeks.

We were left with a single pack of hamburger, all the veggies and a few boxes of pasta.

Her boyfriend said she told him they could eat the food. She dumped him but wants $1k back to buy new groceries – she says it’s the principal, because she knows she makes a lot more money than he does.

Jack started scrambling when we entered the home, saying “sorry, I was gonna clean before you got back but I didn’t expect you so soon”.

I just gave a hushed “please leave”. He and his daughter left.

But after giving it some thought, I told him he had to reimburse us the $1000 worth of food that he and his daughter ate.

I told him their intake was absolutely repulsive. That I said he could have some, not eat everything in the house and leave us with nothing.

He said that he had allowed his kid to have her friends over and they are a lot but he shouldn’t have to give me $1000, given that I told him they could eat the food. That I have more than enough money (true) and he doesn’t (also true).

I still want to be reimbursed however. And yes, we split up.

AITA?

Did OP overreact? I bet Reddit is going to have her back!

The top comment says there are just big red flags on his part.

This person says that $1k is cheap to realize what she’d be getting before a wedding.

It’s pretty wild they could have faked things for 2 years.

No one blames her for being super upset.

Their priorities do not seem to be aligned at all.

OP definitely dodged a bullet here.

And honestly, they don’t seem all that well-suited to begin with.

If you liked that story, check out this one about a woman who went on a date with somebody who was 10 years older than her. Find out what happened!