Imagine having multiple roommates, and one of them hates another roommate. If the roommate she hated didn’t realized she hated her, would you tell her or let her be oblivious to the situation?

In this story, one young woman is in this exact situation, and she accidentally let the truth slip out. She didn’t know how to recover and may have made the situation worse.

Let’s read all the details.

AITA for telling my roommate one of our old roommates didn’t like her?

I (22F) have mostly lived with the same group of girls for the past 4 years, we’re all around the same age.

This particularly revolves around 2 of them: “Brenna” and “Ashlynn”.

Brenna has become one of my closest friends and I love her, but even she admits she can be “a lot”. She is autistic, leading her to often hyper fixate, miss social cues, and get easily flustered.

Myself and most of our other roommates get along with her.

But one roommate does not like Brenna at all.

Ashlynn, however, couldn’t stand her. She found Brenna very annoying. She also didn’t like how she would hear Brenna speak to her (meaning Brenna’s) mother.

Once, Ashlynn overheard Brenna cursing out her mom and just couldn’t move on from it.

I know Brenna and her mom have a complicated relationship. I don’t exactly agree with how she talks to her sometimes, but I won’t deny there are times I’ve wanted to say some of the same stuff to my mom.

It annoyed Ashlynn even more that Brenna kept trying to be her friend.

I think a lot of Ashlynn’s annoyance also stemmed from Brenna not being able to pick up on hints that she didn’t like her.

She tried to avoid her and Brenna would just try to invite her to do things, talk to her, etc.

There were points Ashlynn was a little mean to her, to try to get the point to sink in, and Brenna thought she was just joking.

And to be fair, we all joke around a bit.

Life has moved on, and Ashlynn has moved out.

We all graduated from college in the spring. Ashlynn got a job out of state and moved. 2 of our other roommates also moved, so we got a few new ones.

One of them is pretty lazy, doesn’t do their share of the chores, and recently missed a rent payment. We’re dealing with it, and she won’t be extending her lease after the New Year, but everyone’s annoyed, for obvious reasons.

The other night, Brenna, myself, and our other roommate that’s been around since freshman year “Sage” went out to dinner. We were all venting about lazy roommate and somehow, the discussion turned to how our old roommates would’ve handled her.

She accidentally said something she probably shouldn’t have said.

I ended up saying “Ashlynn would’ve hated her more than she hated Brenna”.

Brenna gave me a weird look and asked “Ashlynn hated me?”

It took me a minute to realize what I said, and just decided to role with it. I told her everything Ashlynn had hated about her.

Brenna was confused, but admitted she couldn’t deny any of it.

Sage changed the conversation. I thought it was over.

It wasn’t over.

Well, I guess not.

Sage and Brenna share a room, and Sage has told me that since this talk, Brenna’s been spiraling. She feels terrible that she annoyed Ashlynn and keeps thinking of all the times she embarrassed herself in front of her.

She’s really been stuck on this.

Sage is mad at me and says I shouldn’t have said anything.

The argument continued.

I said I didn’t predict it’d cause this many issues.

I pointed out, it’s not like they’ll see each other again. Plus, Brenna has to get used to people not liking her.

Sage rolled her eyes, and said she is used to it. We both know she was bullied, struggles making friends. She didn’t need a reminder that to some she’s “too much”.

I didn’t realize Sage was so protective of Brenna.

Was I really a jerk for saying it?

She didn’t mean to hurt Brenna’s feelings. It seems that she made the comment without really thinking and wasn’t sure how to recover. Was she wrong for being completely honest?

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this story.

It wasn’t necessary to give examples.

This is a good point.

Another person thinks she wasn’t a very good friend.

If only she could go back and change what she said.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.