June 9, 2026 at 11:35 pm

Woman Plans to Skip Funeral Viewing for Friends, but Family Accuses Her of Disrespect

by Benjamin Cottrell

woman standing next to a funeral casket

Pexels/Reddit

Not everyone grieves the same way and not everyone sees a viewing as a necessary part of that process, but explaining that to a grieving father the day after a loss is a difficult conversation to have.

A woman whose grandmother passed recently told her father she’d be skipping the viewing to attend a project meeting for a festival that represented a meaningful step forward in her social and creative life.

However, her father wasn’t receptive at all and reminded her that her grandmother helped raise her, that the rest of the grandchildren would all be there, and that this wasn’t how she was brought up to behave.

Read on — this story doesn’t have a clean verdict and that’s exactly what makes it interesting.

AITA for not attending viewing the deceased

My grandma passed on Sunday.

I’m not particularly sad — I’m kind of relieved for her that it’s over.

But her and her family don’t seem to see eye-to-eye on the best way to grieve.

Tomorrow is the funeral, which I’m going to attend, but half an hour ago my father yelled at me because I don’t want to attend today’s viewing.

I explained to him that today I have a project meeting for a festival next week and that I don’t really like going to viewings.

Her father took this extremely personally.

He was furious because that’s not the way he raised me, because Granny took care of me during childhood, and because every other grandkid will be there besides me.

For me, preparing for the festival is important because I finally have friends I can spend time with, and it’s a big step toward bigger projects.

She has her own thoughts when it comes to the ceremony of grieving.

I don’t believe that group mourning honors the deceased any better than if I did it alone at the cemetery.

Every viewing I remember is monotonous praying and small groups sitting in corners talking about anything but the person who passed.

AITA?

Losing a loved one brings out a lot of strong emotions in everyone, which, in turns, brings up a lot of conflict.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a kind man who helped a friend pack up items to donate, then realized she wanted to take back her “payment.”

Reddit is sure to have some big opinions on this one.

Attending the viewing would help more people than just herself.

Screenshot 2026 06 08 at 5.19.57 PM Woman Plans to Skip Funeral Viewing for Friends, but Family Accuses Her of Disrespect

This user thinks future her will thank her for doing right by her family.

Screenshot 2026 06 08 at 5.20.39 PM Woman Plans to Skip Funeral Viewing for Friends, but Family Accuses Her of Disrespect

Maybe she doesn’t have the most solid excuse for skipping.

Screenshot 2026 06 08 at 5.21.15 PM Woman Plans to Skip Funeral Viewing for Friends, but Family Accuses Her of Disrespect

If she chooses to not attend, she’s going to have to deal with the consequences, whatever those may be.

Screenshot 2026 06 08 at 5.22.24 PM Woman Plans to Skip Funeral Viewing for Friends, but Family Accuses Her of Disrespect

At the end of the day, no one likes going to viewings, but they do it anyway, either out of love, obligation, respect, or all of the above.

It’s clear this woman loved her grandmother, but as many redditors pointed out, her priorities seem to be a little off. She needs a reminder that funerals are more for the living than the deceased, and there are living people, like her father, who really need her support.

She’ll have plenty of time to pursue new opportunities with her friends, but this is her last chance to pay her respects.

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.