Sometimes being a part of a family means dishing out the tough love when required – but what happens when the other person thinks we crossed a line?

OP’s sister-in-law used to work part time and care for the kids and house as well. The kids were always on time and healthy, the house was always clean, and meals were always prepped.

I love my SIL and brother. They have two kids and my SIL Rachel was a kinda a SAHM. She worked from home part time but also took care of the kids, and all the chores.

I was over multiple times and the house was spotless. Really I thought she was just extra cleaning when she had guests but no. When I had my kid she showed me her schedule. She would be up at 5 for meal prepping for the whole day.

Like she never stopped and a lot of her tips helped me with my own home.

When OP’s brother lost his job they swapped roles, with the sister-in-law going back to work and him staying home to parent/keep house.

Now my brother lost his job and it was decided that Rachel would go back to work full time and he would stay at home.

The kids are in kindergarten and first grade, he has this on easy mode.

It’s going miserably, with the house looking awful, the kids being late to school, etc. When he asked OP to take the kids to school she called him out on his crap, letting him know that his wife was going to leave him if he couldn’t figure it out.

I’ve been over to help sometimes since he just sucks at it. The house is always a mess, the kids are usually late to school ( he asked me to drive them after the school talked to him). He doesn’t cook it just sad.

He got in a huge argument with his wife since dinner wasn’t done and she had to make it. He was ranting about how it unfair and that he is trying.

I told him it’s pathetic he can’t do the basic of what his wife did. He has 8 hours free and he can’t keep the house clean. I told him she will divorce him if he doesn’t stop being lazy and figure it out.

He got mad, and even though their mom was initially on his side, she quickly changed teams after photographic evidence was submitted by the SIL.

He left after calling me a jerk and my mom is now on me for what I said

Updates: I love my SIL, my mom apologized to me. Rachel sent my mom what the kitchen and house looks like. The messages from the school and apparently a text argument about how he shouldn’t be doing this. She gave him two options, get his life together or get out.

I learned a lot more about the situation and learned he wasn’t packing the kids lunches the last two days. I think he just broke his marriage

Should OP have kept out of it? I bet Reddit has thoughts!

The top comment says he probably needed to hear it.

Most people can’t get over the fact that the kids are consistently late for school.

This person wonders if he really even knows what he’s supposed to be doing.

And this commenter wonders if he’s not doing it on purpose.

But this person thinks he’s just selfish.

This story is way too common, I’m afraid.

A divorce is probably going to be the only answer she can live with.