Things get complicated after people have kids and one of the things that seems to come up from time to time is who is allowed to hold a newborn baby…and who isn’t.

Was this woman wrong for the decision she made?

Check out what she had to say…

AITA for not letting my autistic BIL hold my newborn?

My fiance (24M) and I (19F) had our first baby last week.

He was born healthy but giving birth was very traumatic and hard on me mentally/physically. I had an emergency c-section after being in labor for three days. I still feel extremely foggy and out of touch with reality.

I only wanted my fiance’s parents present to meet the baby in the hospital. The rest were welcome to Facetime us, but they would have to wait to see our son after we’d gone home and had time to adjust to having a newborn.

She has a rocky past with her family.

I’m not close with my family because I left home at 18 to escape their abuse. Almost none of them are allowed contact with my child because of the way they treated me and my siblings.

My fiance’s family are a very close-knit group, and all of them have been very kind and welcoming to me up until this point. I wouldn’t be marrying in if they weren’t.

The only one I’ve had issues with is my fiance’s brother (30M) who has autism. He makes a lot of offhand comments and jabs that get passed off as ‘dark humor’.

When my in-laws got there, they brought my fiance’s older brother who they care for and let live with them. He’s diagnosed with autism but does not have any severe disabilities.

I wasn’t happy that they’d brought him against my wishes, but I didn’t say anything after everything I’d gone through.

They disagreed about his brother.

My fiance’s brother was adamant about holding our son. He was loud, had an attitude, and smelled terrible. His clothes were dirty and his hair was covered in grease. It was like he hadn’t showered in weeks.

Again, I didn’t comment on his hygiene, but I tried to preface that I didn’t want anyone holding the baby right now except my in-laws. I was as kind as possible.

My in-laws told me that he didn’t mean any harm and that he could wash his hands.

I told them no again, and my fiance backed me up when they didn’t calm down.

My FIL law took his son home and my MIL stayed and apologized, but my fiance’s brother is apparently ‘deeply hurt’ and texted my fiance to tell him not to marry me because I’m “driving them apart” and “a ***** who wants to keep him from his nephew”.

Let’s see what people had to say about this story.

One person said she’s NTA and this isn’t about him being autistic.

Another individual said he’s not entitled to this.

One Reddit user said this reminds them of their own life.

Another Reddit user said this situation is untenable.

And one reader said this is just expected in some families.

This wouldn’t be a tough decision for me.

Autistic or not, if somebody can’t take care of their own hygiene… there’s no way I’m letting them touch my baby.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.