Being a part of your best friend’s wedding;

it can be challenging, but it can also be one of the most memorable days ever.

It’s just usually those weeks leading up to that special day that can cause the most headaches.

Egos can get in the way, and the focus on the end result can get lost.

That’s exactly what went down in this story from Reddit.

AITA for refusing to be maid of honour over a bridesmaid, causing her to get “fired”?

The people in this story are my best friend “Jane”, her brother “Elliot”, and his girlfriend of two years, “Kathy”.

Jane is marrying her fiancé Tom in July and she asked me to be her maid of honour. This was sort of expected as Jane is essentially a sister to me. I was surprised, however, that she asked her brother’s girlfriend, Kathy, to be a bridesmaid.

OP tells us that it was a bit…coerced…

Jane later confided that Kathy had kind of pressured her into it and she had done it to make Elliot happy.

And here’s where the crux of this story stems from.

The issue is, Kathy hates me. Like seriously hates me. She blames me for all the issues she has with Elliot and Jane’s parents, and for her not having a better friendship with Jane.

She also thinks I am trying to steal Elliot from her (I’m not) but also cannot handle whenever he and I disagree on anything and will go way overboard defending him and arguing with me. I was determined to put this all aside for Jane, though.

Things only heated up to a tipping point after that.

OP dropped an ultimatum.

This was actually not going too badly, but last weekend we went to a bridal shop to choose bridesmaid dresses. Jane mentioned that she wanted me and Elliot to walk down the aisle together, and Kathy lost it.

She called me desperate, crazy, a pick me, a fake, fat, and a bunch of other things. Looking back, I probably should have said more than I did, but at that moment I could see how everyone was looking at her, and I didn’t want them looking at me the same way, so I literally just said “yeah I’m not dealing with this. Either she’s out, or I am” and picked my stuff up and left.

Safe to say she took the high road here.

(I apologised to Jane for the drama and offered her a long weekend of babysitting and some flowers to make up for it and she accepted so we’re ok now)

Because of this, Jane has said that Kathy can’t be a bridesmaid anymore because she wants me as maid of honour. This has caused issues with Kathy, and Elliot by extension.

The aftermath has her rethinking things though.

Both Elliot and Kathy have apologised and said Kathy will behave better for all the wedding events, but I’m not willing to budge. Jane’s mother and my mother both think I should drop the ultimatum, and I don’t want to make things hard on Jane, so I’m rethinking.

But I know there’s other things she will try to cause issues with me over and I just don’t know how long I can keep being the bigger person with her.

So AITA for causing this drama?

Let’s head down and see what folks had to say.

One person dropped an NTA, reminding that putting up with this kind of abuse is out of line.

Another NTA from this person who gave the MOH all the flowers.

While this commenter thought it might have even been deliberate by Jane.

And another NTA vote from this person who did not want to see OP budge an inch.

Jealous entitlement gone awry!

If you liked that post, check out this one about an employee that got revenge on HR when they refused to reimburse his travel.