To the extent possible, it is generally a good thing to have a good relationship with your half-siblings as it can be a major blessing in life.

What happens if your dad, who was absent most of your childhood, pressures you to get close with your half-siblings now that he finally moved back to the area?

That is what is happening to the 16 year old boy in this story, and he has no interest in building that relationship.

AITA for missing another “big moment” for my half siblings?

My dad is so inconsistent about being in my life.

He and my mom divorced when I was 1 but he bailed days after I was born, came back when I was 8 months old and my mom let him stay a month before realizing he wasn’t serious about being a family with us and just used her for a place to stay.

He is barely trying.

Once he realized she wasn’t going to give in he bailed again.

He was in my life for a year when I was 3-4 years old. Then he was gone again. The next time I was 8.

He was in my life for a few months under supervision but he left again and he made 2 appearances when I was 10.

He didn’t really pay child support either, which I learned this summer. Some money was given for me but probably less than $400 in the last 16 years if what he said is right.

At least he is making an attempt I guess.

When I was 13 he moved here for good, or so he says.

He was married again and he had some kids with his wife.

He went back to restart visitation with me, got some supervised visits again that became one overnight a month. Until finally I have to spend every other weekend at his house even though I don’t want to.

And I did speak to a judge about my wishes but he told me it was in my best interest to have a relationship with “my family.”

I really don’t like being there and I try to only sleep in the bed I have at his house. I never take anything I care about and I don’t have the room personalized or anything.

The thing about all this is my dad and his wife encourage their kids to spend time with me and engage with me. They like having me there and they told me before they wish I’d spend more time there and with them.

Nothing wrong with this.

The kids did nothing wrong but I don’t want to focus on a relationship with them. I feel nothing for them.

But it’s expected that I’d be there for the big moments in their lives.

Not just by their parents but my dad’s parents, who I don’t know outside of some of the time I spent with him, also feel like I need to be a good brother and they expect me to take the role seriously.

Which I find crazy since I don’t know any of these people all that much and I don’t want to.

If it’s not my dad’s weekends, I do miss the big stuff and I don’t try to be there for them.

Pressuring him isn’t going to do any good.

I got invited to go trick or treating with them on Halloween.

I said no.

I got a reply back that they really wanted me to come.

I didn’t, and I got sent so many texts from my dad’s phone and phones that I assume are his wife’s and his parents claiming I’m a jerk for missing another big moment for my half siblings.

I blocked the others but dad’s number is still doing this type of thing.

AITA?

While it might be nice to build a relationship with them, there is no obligation on his part.

Read on to see what the people in the comments on Reddit think.

This commenter things dad wants the illusion of a big happy family.

This is the way to handle it.

This should shut him up.

This person points out that dad missed a lot of this young man’s big moments.

How is Halloween a Big Moment?

Dad needs to fix his relationship with his son first.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.