She wrangled the kids, got everyone ready, and walked to dinner while her husband stayed glued to the couch playing emotional games.

When he showed up late and found the seafood gone, he didn’t thank her for saving him a plate—he called her stupid for not saving his favorite dishes.

Read on for the story…

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband

My family 3 kids and I were in the midst of getting ready to leave to have dinner with my in laws that live down the road, while my husband simply laid on the couch waiting for everyone to be ready.

When it was time to put our shoes on I asked if he was getting up and he said that maybe he would if we all gave him a kiss.

I felt that that was ridiculous and manipulative and was not in the mood for it (we have been having some issues I felt this was his way of controlling the situation and getting everything back to ‘normal’) so we all went to put on our shoes without him.

Serves him right?

He pretended to fall asleep and when shoes were all on I called out to him again and his response was the same, so I decided to leave without him and walk.

We arrived for dinner.

His parents asked where he was, and I told them he was sleeping.

Towards the end of the meal I decided to pack some food up to bring him in case he was hungry.

As frustrated as I am with him, I thought I could at least be decent enough to bring dinner home for him.

After almost everyone was eating he showed up to an empty table looking rather disappointed.

Well, quite literally, ya snooze ya lose.

I pointed out the box of food I had saved for him and offered it but he was still not pleased. “What is this? No seafood? Where’s the abalone? The clams? Fish? You didn’t save any for me?”

All gone.

He looked disappointed and even called me stupid.

I walked away and told his parents the situation.

Mil: you didn’t save him any abalone etc? Don’t you know he likes those?

Fil: when I was working my wife saved the food I like for me.

Oh dear.

I can appreciate that it would have been more thoughtful if I’d packed food earlier when there was more left, including the food he enjoys more, but I think the thought was still there and I really didn’t expect to be met with this reaction.

In my opinion, he made the choice not to leave when we did and I was doing him a favor by packing food for him when he didn’t ask me to.

So AITA for forgetting to pack seafood?

For context, I’m a white girl married to a Chinese man, so if you have any insight into traditional Chinese culture I would appreciate that.

Maybe the real thing missing from that dinner wasn’t the seafood—it was basic respect.

Quite literally no one is on the lazy, rude husband’s side here.

This person called him manipulative.

This person called him gross.

And this person called him disrespectful.

Apparently, abalone matters more than effort?

She’s got a lot to think about after this.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.