When you lose someone very close to you, it’s a natural part of grieving to want to honor their memory.

But the decision on how to do that can be complicated. See why this couple want different things.

WIBTA if I tell my stepdaughter and my wife that I don’t want to use the investments I made for my late daughter to finance her college education?

My daughter passed away 6 years ago fighting a rare genetic condition. The condition was also responsible for my late wife’s death when my daughter was only an infant.

But he hasn’t forgotten his late daughter.

I’m now married to my amazing wife. I have a stepdaughter who will be starting high school shortly.

I made a lot of investments for my late daughter. I thought I could give her a head start in life, but that never happened.

So I decided to donate the money to a charity that helps kids with genetic disorders. The investments I made mature in a year and I plan on donating all of it.

His wife has another idea.

Now my wife wants me to use the money for my stepdaughter. She tells me that this will help her have a head start in life and that would partially fulfill the purpose of the investments.

She thinks this will also help us finance her college education. She doesn’t want her getting bogged down by loans, which is a sound argument. I love my stepdaughter, but I don’t think I’m ready to do this.

I want to donate the money. WIBTA here?

Here is what people are saying.

True. This is more urgent.

I agree, he seems indifferent to his stepdaughter.

I agree. This is part of his grief, so that will be a factor.

I got the impression she wants to avoid paying for it.

Aw. This broke my heart.

Why not donate later?

If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.