It’s hard not to feel disrespected when small choices keep creating extra work for the same person.

What would you do if you were already cooking dinner and your partner suddenly changed their mind, even after you explained how much more work it would create? Would you let it go to avoid an argument? Or would you feel upset by the whole situation?

In the following story, one woman finds herself in this predicament and reaches her boiling point. Here’s what happened next.

AITAH for getting upset with my fiancé over dinner?

My fiancé and I live together and have two kids. I handle most of the household planning and cleaning, and this has been an ongoing source of tension.

Tonight, I was cooking dinner for both of us. I was already busy making chicken wings and frying chips.

While I was in the middle of cooking, my fiancé told me he didn’t want chips and wanted noodles instead.

I explained that it didn’t make sense to change the plan because the pot with oil would need to cool, be cleaned, and reused, and that it would create extra work.

He went ahead and did it anyway.

He then said he’d just use another pot to make noodles for himself.

I told him I wasn’t okay with that because he regularly uses dishes and leaves them dirty for me to clean.

Literally every single night.

Our sink is often full, and he stacks dirty pots and plates instead of washing them.

Despite this, he went ahead and made the noodles anyway.

After eating, he left the dirty pots and dishes in the sink and went to bed, leaving me to deal with the mess as usual.

The house isn’t her only job.

Mind you, I work full-time and do an extra job, so all the household planning, budgeting, etc.

Today was the first day of my annual leave, and I spent it deep-cleaning and steam-cleaning our home, as we are expecting guests next week.

I got angry because this pattern happens often: he changes plans without considering the extra work it creates, ignores my concerns when I explain them, and leaves the cleanup to me.

AITA?

Wow! It sounds like there’s a lot to unpack here.

Let’s see what the folks over at Reddit think about the whole thing.

This is actually an excellent question.

For this person, everyone has a hand in this.

Here’s someone who would separate herself from him.

According to this person, she deserves better.

She needs to reassess her life.

In doing so, she may realize she’s way better off without him and all of that stress.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.