It’s hard to celebrate someone else’s big moment when your own life is falling apart.

So, what would you do if your best friend booked a $2,500 overseas bachelor trip without your consent while your basement was flooding and your income was dropping? Would you scramble to pay your portion? Or would you back out because you simply cannot afford it?

In the following story, one best man finds himself in this situation and can’t afford to go.

AITA for backing out of my best friend’s bachelor party?

I’m 27 year old Male, and I was supposed to be Bruce’s best man. He is currently 25 and will marry sometime this year.

A short while ago, Bruce, Kevin, his brother, this guy Henry (I barely know him), and I started considering an overseas bachelor trip. The price? About $2,500 each.

On our first conversation, we all somewhat shrugged and said, “Sure, that works,” but decided not to schedule anything yet. We decided to wait a few days. Just a short period to let everyone think it over, and then schedule a call.

Bruce went ahead and scheduled the trip.

After three days, the group had the follow-up conversation. I missed it because the basement in my house flooded that evening, so I was tied up working to protect my things and keep the water out.

I sent Bruce a text, told him what was going on, and asked him to keep me informed of the outcome of their decision. While I’m still dealing with my flooded basement, Bruce just goes ahead and makes the trip reservation.

He covers all expenses, does not consult me, doesn’t obtain my consent, absolutely nothing. None of us even had passports yet. Not a single person bothered to say the tickets were non-refundable. I didn’t approve a single thing.

Things continued going downhill for him.

He called my family for my information to place in the reservation. Bruce shares a message in the chat group, letting everyone know we gotta pay by March break. He already knew I was strapped for cash, well before I spelled out all the facts.

After that, things continued to spiral out of control in my life.

I’m self-employed as a house painter, and suddenly jobs started getting pushed back. My vehicle overheated, and I found out I need a replacement radiator. I am still dealing with flood damage. The pace of work decreased, and money decreased.

After everything, I messaged Bruce to let him know I couldn’t afford the trip anymore and wanted to have a conversation. He demanded I call him right away, even though I was at work.

Then, he exposed him to the group.

He went to share it in the group chat, said he was “airing dirty laundry,” and essentially told everyone I was backing out because of my financial situation. That’s when the group piled on and started roasting me for backing out.

Bruce told me this trip was the single most important thing to him, end of story, regardless of what I was handling. His last message said that if I truly cared for him, “even a tiny bit,” I’d phone him at once, never mind my car, the flooding, or the reality that I’m struggling.

I understand I should have said something sooner. But i also I did not consent to a non-refundable trip. I had a role in the first discussion, not the second, plus I genuinely can’t afford it without completely ruining my situation.

AITA?

Wow! It’s easy to see both sides of this, but it sounds like he needs to communicate better.

Let’s check out what the folks over at Reddit think about him backing out.

This person feels sympathy for them.

Here’s someone who doesn’t think he’s wrong for backing out.

For this person, his family should’ve stayed out of it.

There are no winners for this reader.

It’s not a small amount of money, so he should’ve brought it up earlier, but his friends should’ve asked before booking.

Geez.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.