Have you ever had a neighbor who you thought was your friend, but then one day they decided to be your enemy?

What would you do in that situation?

In this story, one family is dealing with this exact issue with their next door neighbor, and to make matters worse, this is an HOA neighborhood. The neighbor keeps reporting them to the HOA for every minor thing and some things that don’t even seem like real violations of the rules.

They are so frustrated with this situation and not sure how to get it to stop.

Let’s read all about it to see how this drama started.

NFH harrassing through HOA Complaints. WWYD??

My family has lived in an upper-middle-class HOA neighborhood in Colorado for about 10 years.

When we first moved in, we became close with the neighbor next door. We had dinner together, exchanged homemade food, helped each other out, and genuinely got along. He even gave us landscaping advice and occasionally mowed our lawn.

Then everything changed over one disagreement.

I don’t see why this would cause a problem.

Last year, we hired a contractor to install a concrete patio in our backyard. The easiest way to get the equipment in was to briefly drive it across a small section of our neighbor’s front yard.

We asked politely, assured him we’d pay for any damage, and completely understood if he said no.

He refused.

There was a little back-and-forth, but we respected his decision. We ended up paying significantly more to complete the project another way, and we thought that would be the end of it.

Then the neighbor complained.

It wasn’t

Shortly afterward, the first HOA complaint was filed regarding a pile of deck boards we placed in a corner of our backyard.

We confronted him and asked him why he wouldn’t just talk to us first, when we had been friendly for so long. It felt like a betrayal.

He was angry, said it was in his rights, and veey rude – before finally apologizing.

I think they should’ve accepted his apology. Their friend has become their enemy.

We did not accept his apology and he did not like that.

From stepping stones we put out for a party. Then a tree that “needed trimming.” Then peeling paint on our deck.

Since then, we’ve been receiving HOA violation notices constantly—sometimes 5 or 6 at a time, every couple of weeks.

We know they’re coming from him because the photos are clearly taken from his backyard overlooking ours.

This is getting out of control!

It hasn’t stopped with the HOA. We’ve also received noise complaints and even reports to Animal Welfare over our dog barking occasionally.

Before the patio incident, he never complained about our yard, our dog, or anything else.

Now it feels like he’s watching us constantly.

If we’re outside, he’s looking through the window. If we move patio furniture, plant something new, or make any change to our property, another complaint follows. Sometimes he reports things before he even knows whether we’ve already received HOA approval.

This is why people hate HOAs.

The frustrating part is that the HOA seems to forward every complaint without question.

One notice claimed our tree needed trimming—even though there’s nothing in the HOA covenants requiring trees to be kept at a certain height or distance from the house.

When we pointed out that dozens of homes in the neighborhood had similar trees, the HOA basically told us they can send us a notice for anything they want and expected us to comply anyway.

It honestly feels like they’re making up rules as they go.

They admit that their yard isn’t perfect.

For context, our yard is clean and maintained.

Is it as pristine as his? No. He’s retired, spends hours every day working on his landscaping, and takes enormous pride in it.

We’re a working family with jobs, kids, and limited free time. We aren’t neglecting our property—we just aren’t trying to win Yard of the Month.

They’ve tried everything.

We’ve tried to resolve this like adults.

We requested HOA mediation. He didn’t show.

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We’ve knocked on his door. He won’t answer.

We’ve texted him asking him to simply talk to us if there’s an issue. No response.

They are so fed up.

At this point, it feels less like legitimate complaints and more like a year-long campaign of harassment.

Has anyone dealt with a neighbor like this? Is there anything we can do besides continue responding to endless HOA notices? Has anyone had success documenting a pattern of harassment, working with the HOA board, or even pursuing legal action?

We’re exhausted and just want to enjoy living in our own home again.

I’m not sure why the neighbor got upset and reported them the first time. They didn’t do anything wrong. They simply asked him for a favor. He said no, and they respected that decision. But maybe the whole thing would’ve been over if they had simply accepted his apology. It’s probably too late for that now, but not accepting the apology was a big mistake.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this story.

If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em, the HOA board that is.

Yes, this is the real problem.

Here’s some advice.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a disabled driver who gets revenge on a woman who took a handicapped spot.

Here’s a similar thought.

I wonder why the neighbor got so mad at them. Was he upset that they asked if they could drive through his driveway? They didn’t actually do it. They just asked. It’s not like they did it anyway. Then, I could totally understand it.

It’s sad that their friend became their enemy. You don’t want to be on that guy’s bad side!