Concerned Grandmother Sees One Grandson Working Hard While Another Does Nothing, So She Plans A Tough Reality Check About Where His Choices Could Lead
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Supporting an adult child forever is not always possible.
One grandmother worries her unemployed grandson has no plan for independence.
His parents recognize the problem but never follow through.
She is considering one very direct conversation.
Check out how it all went down.
WIBTA if I gave my grandson a wake-up call?
I have 4 adult grandsons, ranging in age from 20 – 27. 3 are employed; the middle one is not.
“Bob” says that he’s trying, but nobody will hire him because he’s disabled.
His brothers say differently, that he makes no effort to avail himself of the assistance available, just eats and sleeps and plays video games.
Say it with me: Laaaazy.
Thing is, his younger brother has exactly the same disability, but has been employed since he was a senior in high school, first as a work-study intern, now as a part-time employee who expects to go to full-time as soon as his probation term is ended. He has already earned performance bonuses.
His father “Jim” is not in the greatest of health, and has a family history of early death from heart disease. Jim is taking the best care of his health that he can, and has already surpassed the age that his own father died by several years, but the possibility is always there.
My grandson seems to think that he can go on the way that he is indefinitely, that Mom & Dad will continue to provide for him forever.
Oh boy.
We have spoken to his parents several times, both when we saw that he was being babied as a child, and again as he became a young adult.
That they need to light a fire under his butt and insist that he really start looking for work. They agree that yeah, they do, but apparently can’t or won’t follow through.
WIBTA if I told him straight out that his parents aren’t going to live forever and he needs to grow up, start adulting, and start earning his keep?
Now, she’s turning to Reddit to decide whether blunt honesty would be overstepping…or long overdue. The verdict? Yes, yes they’d be the AH.
This person spells it out for them.
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This person says they’re being selfish.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a kis who cooks and pays rent, so doesn’t think they should have to do the dishes, too.
And this person it stinks but no, just no.
This grandmother had valid concerns about her grandson’s future, especially with his parents unable to support him forever.
A firm but compassionate conversation focused on available assistance and practical planning could provide the wake-up call he needs.
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