Man Asks if He’s Wrong for Talking His Family Out of Giving His Sister-In-Law a Traditional Wedding Gift
by Matthew Gilligan
Wedding gifts can get tricky.
And they can get even trickier when people getting married are from different cultures.
And this guy wants to know if he’s wrong for the stance he’s taken about his brother’s upcoming wedding.
Read his story below and see what you think.
AITA for talking my family out of giving my future SIL our traditional wedding gift and risk being uninvited?
“My family is Asian while my future SIL is white. I don’t have a problem with interracial relationships as we have several members of our extended family who married other races. In fact, I’m currently in a serious relationship with a woman who is also white.
My GF is wonderful and loves trying new things that my culture has to offer. Some things she loves, other things she likes, and she down right h**es some things. The main point is that she tries them whether it’s music, food, or traditions. My future SIL is the complete opposite.
She rarely comes to family dinner because she doesn’t like the smell of our food. She doesn’t join in our celebrations because it’s so different. For example the lunar new year is a huge celebration for us and she calls it a fake new year we made up just to party.
She and my brother are having their wedding soon and surprise, she didn’t want any of our culture in it. It got to the point that my parents almost refused to go. We had to have a huge sit down to smooth things over and I was actually on my brother’s side even though I was also annoyed by SIL. I told my parents it is their wedding and we should stay out of the planning.
The trouble started when my GF and I took my parents out for my mom’s birthday. My GF commented on my mom’s necklace to which my mom answered that she already picked out the style for my GF’s jewelry set when we get married. In our tradition, the family of the groom gifts their new DIL a necklace, earrings, and another piece of jewelry during the morning event on the wedding day. This set usually cost $40-50k in my family tradition.
My GF was honored then asked if my mom picked out one yet for SIL since their wedding was coming out. My mom said no and that she was going to meet with the jewelers soon to see what they have to offer. I spoke up and asked why they’re going through with this one tradition when SIL forbade all of our other traditions. I said I wasn’t chipping in and suggested gifting her a toaster.
Last night and my brother calls me screaming with SIL yelling in the background. Apparently our parents told them we’re not keeping the one tradition that will cost us $40-50k. He called me an AH and told me that unless I (and my parents) follow through on the jewelry gift, we are uninvited.
AITA for following SIL lead in keeping our traditions out of their wedding?”
Let’s see what people had to say about this on Reddit.
One person said she sounds rude and ra**st.
This Reddit user said it sounds like she’s a gold digger.
And one individual said he’s NTA and he needs to talk to his brother.
What a mess!
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