As we get older, we all have to walk that line between pleasing our parents and being there for our significant others.

I mean sure, most of us know we need to choose our partner over our parents, but the guilt can still trip us up, right?

OP’s mom wants him and his sister to go on a cruise for her 60th birthday.

My mother’s 60th is coming up. She is asking to go away on a cruise with both my sister and I in May.

I moved out about two years ago into my house.

He wants to go out of town with his new girlfriend.

Fast forward – I (31 M) have a new gf. We started dating two months ago. She’s absolutely everything I’ve been searching for and then more. It’s the ideal and perfect relationship. She has to go to Colorado also in May for two weeks…

It is unlikely I can take off for an entire month.

I’ve been on cruises before with mom/sis and as much as I want to celebrate her 60th I want to be with the gf and finally live my life. I’ve never felt such happiness before with another individual… And I want to keep chasing that.

His mom is giving him a major guilt trip.

I’m being called selfish and “choosing some new girl over family”. She also guilt trips me with the “you know I’ll be dead some day right?” line.

AITA for choosing to go on a trip with my new partner than my own mother?

In the comments, he gave us a little (needed) context.

“She’s manipulative and controlling. If she doesn’t get her way she has a temper tantrum and emotionally abuses whoever. I’ve unfortunately learned bad behaviors from her and started to unlearn those.

When I’m with mom, I get triggered or I resort to a bad emotional state. I’ve reached a point where I love my mom but I also can’t stand her. It’s hard to explain.

I want to not upset her but I also don’t want to go on another cruise when we just went on one in… July.”

She also wouldn’t let my dad attend my white coat ceremony and played the well if he is there I won’t go card. And then he died from covid 2 years after my graduation. My biggest regret in life was not inviting him and letting my mom win that battle.

Where is Reddit going to fall? Let’s find out!

Some people are stuck on OP just meeting this girl.

And it is coloring their judgement I think.

Other people think the mom has a point.

This commenter thinks OP needs to live his life.

I tend to me in the minority, I guess.

It actually sounds like it’s long past time OP live his life.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.