Everyone who has ever been within 6 feet of a small child knows how messy they are. You could give them a single sock to hold and they will find a way to somehow make a mess with it.

Considering this, as important as it is for a babysitter to keep the kids safe, it may be even harder to keep the kids clean!

But when this user’s cousin lied about a medical emergency so that she would watch her kids, she made sure the kids got as messy as possible before the cousin came to pick them up!

Check it out!

Lie to get us to watch your kids? I can play dirty, and so can your children! (Also features weaponised baked goods.)

The backstory is that I have an annoying cousin Louise (aka Poo-Covered Lou), who is heavily into competitive child-raising, and off-roading her 4WD in my front garden.

She’s no longer allowed on our property. I don’t speak directly to Lou any more, but I do speak to her Mum (Auntie Dot) and my fiancé, Martin, is friends with Lou’s husband Mike.

I don’t work on Thursdays, so I was still getting dressed when I heard a car and some voices.

My cat sprinted off the bed and hid in the bathroom about a nano-second before my cousin’s wonder kids (8M and 6F) burst in. I have no idea why they weren’t at school.

But OP soon found out why her cousin’s kids were over for the surprise visit…

My fiancé was just behind them, looking a bit panicked (very unusual state for him).

Apparently Louise had to take Auntie Dot to the hospital, and urgently needed someone to look after the kids. Martin, being the compassionate soul that he is, agreed.

So we spent the morning looking after the Wonder kids and our own “Vampira” (nearly 2F, and she vants to gnaw your broccoli).

Ok first of all, Vampira?? Second of all, OP soon found out that Louise had been less than truthful with her fiancé…

Just after lunch (healthy and nutritious), Martin tried ringing Lou to get a progress report. No answer.

No biggie, they were in a hospital. But he thought he’d try ringing Lou’s husband Mike, to see if he’d heard anything.

Turned out Mike had no idea the kids were with us, they were supposed to be with his Mum.

The hospital visit was an outpatient clinic for Louise, not an urgent trip for Auntie Dot as implied. Auntie Dot was there for moral support.

And while Mike said he would come pick up the kids, OP didn’t want to inconvenience him with his wife’s lie….

Mike offered to come and collect the Wonder kids, but he’s self-employed and was working on a site about two hours away.

So we agreed to keep the Wonder Kids for the rest of the day. Mike rang back and said Louise would collect the kids at 5pm.

I was fuming. Poo-Covered Lou had lied and taken advantage and managed to worm her way back in. So I decided to play dirty. Literally.

So OP decided that nothing would make Louise’s kids happier than a walk in the incredibly muddy park…

I took the Wonder kids for a walk to the park, while Martin took our youngest to do some shopping.

It was a nice winter’s day, and the kids ran around, fell over, climbed on all the play equipment, jumped in all the muddy puddles.

They even found a heap of “treasures” and put them in their pockets to show their Mum.

We did wash faces and hands afterwards, and cleaned shoes as best we could, but Lou hadn’t provided a change of clothing.

Lou’s kids were obviously a hot mess by the time she came to pick them up…

So by the time she arrived at 6pm (on time for her), the Wonder Kids were tired, happy, hungry and absolutely filthy and keen to show off their “treasures”.

Louise, on the other hand, was not happy, and made the Wonder Kids leave their “treasures” on the nature strip, dirtying their hands again.

Then, when the kids were strapped into their car seats, it was time to enact the final part of my petty revenge.

Martin produced the “shopping” I’d asked him to get, and gave them a paper bag each. I explained they were a little treat for the journey home, to tide them over.

As the masterstroke of her revenge on her cousin, OP had sent them home with the messiest treats possible.

Inside each bag was a sweet bun, known in our house as “instant diabetes”. They are filled with strawberry jam, iced with gooey pink icing, and liberally dusted with desiccated coconut.

According to my Dad, by the time they reached home the Wonder Kids were covered in jam and icing as well as dirt.

They didn’t want dinner (my kids ate their veggies, Lou!) The back seat of Lou’s car was also covered in dirty, sticky finger prints and coconut.

Apparently Lou’s not happy, and even though she’s vacuumed, she’s still finding little shreds of coconut in the back seat.

And oh dearie me, so sad, we’re never allowed to look after her kids ever again. Ever.

“Your kids are never allowed back here again?” Let me guess, until Lou needs OP to watch them last minute for one of her little errands??

Reddit loved OP’s malicious babysitting tactics, and said that now Lou will only be the villain when she refuses to let the kids come over.

And this user consoled OP on the devastating loss of not “getting” to watch Lou’s kids anymore.

And another user even suggested ways that OP could really “treat” her niece and nephew to an amazing day.

Finally, this user was reminded of a hilarious sign she saw in a store.

Bet she’ll think twice before sneakily dropping her kids with OP again!

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.