A Guy Couldn’t Handle That His Cat Preferred His Roommate—So He Tried to Control Both of Them Instead
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Before you get a pet, you might have all these ideas about what life with that pet will be like. If it’s a dog, maybe you’re romanticising those early morning walks every day, or them running to the door when you get home. If it’s a cat, perhaps you are thinking about them purring on your lap as you watch TV in the evening, or dragging a piece of string along the ground for them to play with.
But as fun as that will be, you also have to accept that your pets are living beings, and won’t necessarily be the picture-perfect furry buddy that you were expecting. Maybe the cat doesn’t like to play, or they’re a bit more solitary and not a lap cat. Perhaps the dog can’t walk long distances, or barks when you get home instead.
Of course, when you have your pet you’ll tailor your expectations and love them anyway. And that’s true of the roommate of the guy in this story of course, but he hasn’t quite figured out yet that he can’t control his cat as much as he’d like to.
Read on to find out more.
AITA for not wanting to keep my bedroom door closed because my roommate’s cat prefers spending time with me?
I live with two roommates, one of whom has a cat.
Recently, there’s been an odd situation developing regarding the cat and my bedroom.
I pretty much always leave my bedroom door open when I’m home. I’m used to it, and I like being able to see and hear what’s going on around the house.
The cat is allowed to wander around, so naturally they frequently come into my room.
But that is beginning to cause some problems.
The cat and I are particularly close. I’m clearly their favorite person in the house.
Whenever I’m home, they follow me around, sit at my feet, and generally want to be wherever I am. My room has also basically become their safe space, and they spend a lot of time in there hanging out near me.
Recently, my roommate told me he doesn’t want the cat going into my room any more, and wants me to keep my bedroom door closed from now on.
I’m trying to respect that. The cat is his, so I understand that he gets to decide where the cat is and isn’t allowed to go. I haven’t been deliberately encouraging the cat to come into my room.
That really isn’t working for him, though.
The problem is that I really don’t like having my door closed all the time. It makes me feel isolated from the rest of the house, and it’s just not how I’m accustomed to living.
Having my door open has never been an issue before, and now I feel like I have to keep my room shut off simply because the cat might want to come inside.
My roommate’s reasoning is that he misses when the cat would spend more time in the living room, be more social with everyone, and greet people when they came home.
Since becoming attached to me, the cat now spends much of their time in my room toward the back of the house.
Let’s see how he’s feeling about this.
Given the circumstances, I’m pretty convinced my roommate is at least partly jealous of the relationship I’ve developed with his cat.
I understand why he might feel that way, but I don’t think either of us can control who the cat chooses to spend time with.
What’s also strange is that even when I keep my door closed, the cat still spends a lot of time sitting outside my door.
So I’m not sure closing the door actually solves the underlying problem—it just prevents the cat from being inside while leaving them right outside.
And this is leaving him in a state of turmoil.
I’m willing to respect the rule that the cat isn’t allowed in my room. What I’m questioning is whether that means I should have to keep my bedroom door closed 24/7 to enforce it.
It seems like there might be other ways to encourage the cat to spend more time in the living room—playing with them there, giving treats there, moving some of their favorite things there, etc.
Am I wrong for not wanting to keep my bedroom door closed all the time, even though I’m trying to respect my roommate’s wishes about his cat?
And are there any other solutions I’m overlooking that could accomplish what my roommate wants without requiring me to keep my door closed constantly?
AITA?
The reality that you have to face when you get a pet is that, more or less, they do what they like.
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Sure you can restrict their access to certain rooms or choose whether they go indoors or outdoors.
But you have to respect that cats (and dogs, for that matter) are living beings that have their own minds and make their own choices, and his roommate clearly doesn’t like that.
Let’s see what folks on Reddit had to say about this.
This person agreed that you can’t simply tell a cat what to do.
While others thought that he shouldn’t be made to keep his door closed.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a neighbor who keeps reporting a neighbor who is constantly parking in the handicapped spots.
Meanwhile, this Redditor thought that the roommate needed a reality check about cats.
Sure, of course the roommate is jealous that his cat doesn’t want to hang out with him, and prefers his roommate instead. But that’s just how it is with pets, as it is with kids. Maybe they’ll prefer you, or perhaps they’ll follow the other parent around all the time and you won’t be able to figure out quite what you’ve done wrong. But honestly, it’s not personal. They just behave how they behave, and you have to deal with that. If you want someone to trail around after you and be obsessed with your company and your company only, maybe don’t get a living animal in the first place.
But more than that, this guy shouldn’t be punished because the cat likes to hang out with him. He shouldn’t be made to keep his door closed, thereby isolating himself, just because his roommate is jealous of his friendship with the cat. That’s completely unfair and, honestly, punishing both the human and the cat just because you don’t like that they’re buddies. The truth is, the guy wants his door open, and the cat wants the door open. They’re both miserable now, and it’s all because you’re jealous? Get over yourself.
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