There are so many considerations when you are getting married. You want to continue to be true to yourself and your wants, but now you also have someone else’s wants to consider, too.

And sometimes, you also have the wants of your new in-laws vying for attention as well.

OP’s future mother-in-law is a hobby hairdresser.

My fiancés mother is a Jack of all trades; LPN, hairdresser, and dog groomer.

Currently she is an LPN for work, and she’s in her mid 50s. She only cuts hair from her house now.

She finds her MIL’s skills to be stuck in the past as far as style.

I love her very much, but personally, I believe she has outdated hairstyling techniques. She seems to give very exact, bowl type cuts for men, and they tend to poof out on the sides as well.

Whenever my fiancé gets a haircut from his mom, I don’t really like it, but he insists to “not hurt her feelings”.

I have swallowed my words for 4 years every haircut he gets, but my wedding is where I want to draw the line.

There was also an unfortunate experience with her own hair.

I have had her cut my hair a couple of times, and the last time she cut my hair, I had her take length off.

I am biracial and have curly hair, so I advised her to kind of leave more than she normally would for straight hair. I woke up the next morning and my hair was poofy as a poodle. I looked like Dora pretty much.

It was shorter than chin length, and I wanted it to touch my shoulders. That was the first time I have ever received an undesirable haircut (my mother is also a hairdresser, mid 40s, and it is her main source of income) so it was very devastating for me. Took me a year to grow out all of the issues with the length, and my bangs also were cut very short, way shorter than desired.

Ever since then, I am honestly traumatized and I don’t let her cut my hair anymore.

I never told her how I felt to spare her feelings, but I’m sure she knows I don’t want my hair cut by her anymore since it’s been over a year since she did it last.

To add to this, his mother is very much a worry wart, and she seems very perfectionist, so often times she cuts more and more and more off your head because she wants it to look even. This type of thing worries me and is probably why I had such short hair after my last cut with her.

Now, she wants her fiance to have someone else cut his hair but he’s worried about his mom’s feelings.

Every woman dreams of this day, and I want our wedding photos to be beautiful. I just want to see his hair in a more up-to-date hairstyle than I believe his mom can give him, at least for our wedding photos. It matters very much to me.

AITA for requesting that my fiancé goes to a younger, more up to date hairdresser before our wedding date? He claims that it will hurt her feelings, which may be true, but isn’t our wedding about us?

By the way, by no means is his right to his body being taken away from him, and he wasn’t “forced”. My fiancé was just expressing being worried to upset his mom, and I wanted to know if that makes me an AH for asking him.

Was she wrong to ask? Let’s find out what Reddit thinks!

The top comment had a suggestion for making it easier.

Everyone agrees it would work very well.

It could open up a whole new world for her fiance!

I mean it has to end some day.

Most people agree wedding photos are a Big Deal.

Hey… if she has her reasons, she has her reasons.

That groom would do well to agree.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.