We’ve all been there, right?

Your sister’s kids think you’re the cool aunt, you bring them candy, and then boom—suddenly, you’re a living cautionary tale.

This girl’s sister has been using her past struggles as life lessons for her kids, turning her life’s mess into her parenting hack.

Rude much?

Read on for the full story.

AITA for considering limiting my involvement with my sister’s kids due to her use of my past struggles as lessons.

I 30F have always been close to my older sister 38F. I love spending time with her kids and often help out in my free time.

Growing up wasn’t easy.

I juggled multiple jobs and worked hard to get where I am now without ever asking for financial help from anyone.

She has been using my past struggles as examples for her kids to avoid a lot lately.

She’ll say things like “Look at Auntie. She struggled a lot because she didn’t plan well. Make sure you study hard and get a good job so you don’t end up like her.”

Then she will wink at me as if to reassure me it’s for their good.

That’s messed up.

What does she even mean by ‘end up like me’?

I know I’m not as successful as her and our other siblings but I have a job and a place of my own.

I’ve never asked for money from them or needed to stay with them. I’m not rich but I’m financially stable now.

It stings because it feels like she’s only focusing on the negative parts and not acknowledging how far I’ve come.

No kidding!

Last week she asked me to sit down with her kids to give them advice. During the conversation she brought up a specific situation from my past as a “what not to do” lesson.

Few years ago, I went through a messy divorce that was emotionally draining and took a toll on my well being.

She used this difficult experience as a cautionary tale for her kids. To warn them about the importance of making careful decisions in relationships.

Every time I hear my personal experiences discussed in this way make me feel exposed and reduced to a lesson about what not to do.

What even?!

Talking about it made me feel like my whole life was reduced to that one mistake.

When I brought it up with her, hoping for some understanding.

She argued that she’s just trying to teach her kids to be responsible and learn from others experiences.

She thinks it’s good for them to hear about my failures so they can avoid similar situations.

Isn’t family great?

I told her that while I get her point but constantly using my past as a negative example without acknowledging my successes feels unfair.

I said if she keeps painting me that way to her kids. I’ll have to rethink how involved I am with them.

I’m afraid about how this might affect our relationship and her kids’ view of me. But I believe it already took me long to set some boundaries.

It’s understandable to want the best for your kids, but using your sister’s past struggles as cautionary tales might not be the most effective way to teach them.

According to Reddit, it’s pretty clear who the jerk is here.

The sister basically is terrible, this person says.

This person thinks Sis is going to regret her actions.

This person thinks it’s not her sister’s place at all to share these stories.

Geez.

Family lessons or personal attacks? It’s a thin line between wisdom and shade!

If you liked that story, check out this post about a group of employees who got together and why working from home was a good financial decision.