Mom Defends Daughter’s Appetite At Family Dinner, And It Sparks a Heated Debate Over Manners
by Diana Whelan
What’s the right number of plates at a family dinner?
For one mom, allowing her hardworking daughter to go for a third serving seemed like a no-brainer—until her sister, the host, threw a fit.
What was supposed to be a casual dinner turned into a full-blown argument over etiquette, leaving everyone with a bad taste in their mouth.
Read on for the story.
AITA for assuming my daughter could have a 3rd plate?
Yesterday, my sister hosted a family dinner at her house. It was one of those “just because” dinners, no special occasion.
My sister is a great cook and she made tons of food for that one night. My daughter was on her second plate by the end of the night.
Once she finished she asked if she could get another one. I said yes.
But my sister (her aunt) looked at her with a shocked expression and said “Another plate?”
My daughter turned around and gave me a somewhat uncomfortable look.
Ummm, what?
My daughter is 16, and has 2 part time jobs to pay for some of her college tuition, so she usually doesn’t eat until 7-8pm. So I didn’t even blink twice when she got up to grab her 3rd plate.
I turned to my sister and said she’s been working all day without anything to eat, you made tons of food, it won’t hurt for her to get another plate.
My sister started yelling saying something about how it wasn’t my place to say if my daughter could get more of her food that she made.
This is preposterous.
Now I do somewhat agree with that, and might be a jerk because of that. Looking back I’m thinking maybe I should have asked?
My daughter ended up not getting another plate, and the vibe was awkward now so we just decided to go.
Before we left out the door my sister stopped me and told me I should’ve taught my daughter manners and how it isn’t right to get more than 1 plate at someone else’s house.
Says who?!
I told my sister she was being ridiculous and somehow our voices got loud enough where my mom started to hear us in the small corner.
She came over and started telling me she agreed with my sister and it was rude for my daughter to eat that many plates.
I started to get fed up when they began telling me I wasn’t teaching her proper manners, so I left.
Then of course they began texting my phone saying how it was rude to leave in the middle of our conversation.
I don’t think I was the jerk at all for leaving because I wasn’t going to stay in a place where I felt disrespected.
But I’m not sure about the plate thing.
So am I the jerk for assuming my daughter could get another plate?
The real question remains: Is there truly a limit on hospitality, or were the rules being dished out a little too harshly?
Reddit says it’s the sister, especially since it’s not like she needed the leftovers.
This person can’t even fathom how a family member could forbid food like that.
And this person says they’d actually be flattered about multiple plates, not appalled!
When seconds turn into a scandal, maybe it’s time to ask more questions.
Is the food really the issue, or is something else on the menu?
If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.
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