Who doesn’t like tiki torches?

I’ve never met someone who didn’t, but, according to this Reddit user, those folks are out there…and they’re causing a lot of issues!

Check out what happened in this story that revolves around an annoying neighbor AND some tiki torches.

Start now!

You get a tiki torch, you get a tiki torch. You all get tiki torches!

“This happened a couple years ago. I rent an apartment in a duplex.

The lease says no smoking inside which isn’t a problem for me. But smoking outside does lead to two problems.

One, being the mosquitos. The other being my neighbor, let’s just call her Karen.

Back off, lady.

When I first moved in Karen came right up to me as I was moving boxes and followed me around to ask me questions and lay down the rules of the neighborhood as if she’s the homeowners association.

She told me that fire pits and bonfires (this will come into play later) arent allowed because the street has had a gas leak before, it’s actually a city ordinance that nobody really listens to.

Anyways at first I thought the questions was just a friendly neighbor getting to know me but it quickly felt like an interrogation.

Where are you coming from, where do you work, wife? Kids? Family in the area?

It was just one question after the other then she started telling me about everyone in the neighborhood too.

That was enough for me to not like her. If she’s telling me, basically a stranger all the details she can think of, of everyone around us then nothing I tell her would ever be private.

Anyways I just kept my head down and kept conversations kind of limited whenever I saw her.

I wasn’t mean or cold to her but definitely not as friendly as I could’ve been. But a few months go by and summer starts to pick up as do the mosquitoes in my area.

At first I tried sprays but they don’t work great at repelling. Then I tried citronella candles but because I would blow them out when I was done smoking the wax wouldn’t melt evenly and I would waste a lot.

Maybe this will work.

So I landed on tiki torches. I bought a glass table top tiki torch set it up on the brick patio near my bench and it worked great! For an hour or so.

So I’m sitting on my bench when I hear firetruck sirens. I live near a fire station so that’s not unusual. Until they turn down my street. I’m watching as they pull up to my house.

It’s a narrow street so my first though was that my car and my neighbor across the street were parked in a way blocking them from going down the street.

So I run inside to grab my keys and dash to my car.

But right as I’m at the side walk half a dozen firefighters rush by me to my front yard, to the tiki torch. I have no clue what’s going on and with sirens going I can’t hear them.

One of them leans up close to me and yells in my ear “WHAT IS THAT” A tiki torch!

I replied still confused. “WHAT ARE YOU BURNING” it’s a tiki torch! i repeated exasperated and confused.

A few of them go back and turn off the siren and tell me one of my neighbors must not like me.

Oh, really?

They were called for an out of control firepit. What they saw was a tiki torch with no flammable material around it, being watched by an adult.

They said it’s fine to have a tiki torch and they went on their way.

NOW imagine my surprise when the very next day. I’m on my porch, tiki torch going and I hear sirens again! I think they can’t be me, but lo and behold they turn down my street!

I calmly cap the torch and wait for them. And now they were mad!

They didn’t know who called because they were dispatched by 911 but they told me if it happens again they were going to file misuse of emergency service charges against “whoever.”

Now I’m annoyed too. I’m not in the wrong, this one neighbor doesn’t like me, because I don’t like her.

Literally all my neighbors who’ve met me, wave to me, we move each other’s packages to a more hidden place on porches, help shovel driveways, I’m invited to multiple bbqs every summer and we still manage to stay out of each others business.

Not her.

It was payback time.

So my petty revenge plan came almost immediately. I went back to the grocery store I bought the tiki torch a few days earlier and cleaned them out.

I bought 8 and tons of citronella oil. I think the stockpile of citronella I have is more of a fire hazard than an actual fire pit.

But yeah I handed out them all to the neighbors in view of Karen and explained why I’m giving it and if they ever need the fluid to just text me. They all thought it was hilarious!

So within the coming months my neighbors had the tiki torches proudly displayed on their porches whenever they had company over.

They raised torches and cheers’d me from across the street with a grin.”

Now let’s see what folks had to say on Reddit.

This reader chimed in.

Another individual shared their thoughts.

This Reddit user was a fan of this story.

Another person offered advice.

Another person chimed in.

This person’s neighbor needs to get a life ASAP.

Which is the case for too many people.

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