September 13, 2024 at 6:21 am

Niece Insisted On Using Family’s Private “Castle” For Her Wedding, But Their Uncle Refused To Give Up His Home

by Heather Hall

Source: Shutterstock/Reddit

Family treasures often come with sentimental value, but it’s not uncommon for loved ones to have their own ideas about how to use them.

So, what would you do if a relative wanted to host their wedding at your cherished home, even planning to take over your personal space, which is off limits?

In the following story, one man finds himself in this exact predicament.

Here’s what happened.

AITA for not letting my niece host her wedding at my “castle”?

28 years ago, my wife and I combined our savings (most of which came from inheritance after my father’s passing) and bought our “castle” in southern Europe.

It was actually a derelict farmhouse with some land, but it has a small turret, so our family has always referred to it as ‘The Castle.’

My wife and I decided we’d rather have a small, basic house in our home country and focus our time and resources readying The Castle for us to retire in and for our children to enjoy.

It took years, but around the time our eldest was born, it was finally finished.

It’s not massive; 5 bedrooms and a small pool in the gardens, but it is our paradise.

We’ve always allowed our families and friends to use it whenever they please and have spent every summer vacation staying there with our children.

Here’s where the niece springs her idea on him.

Our only stipulation when people stay there is that the master bedroom is off-limits.

It takes up most of the 3rd floor, with the remaining bedrooms on the 2nd floor.

Many of my and my wife’s belongings are in there, and it’s also the room we have shared for over twenty years.

Recently, my niece got engaged and held an engagement party on Zoom over the weekend.

When asked what ideas they’d had so far, she excitedly told me they’d actually been planning to ask us if they could hold the wedding at The Castle.

I was a bit taken aback but didn’t want to outright refuse.

I joked it would have to be a rather small wedding since they’d struggle to fit more than 25 people in the gardens.

Though she didn’t have permission yet, she had planned everything out.

She gushed that she’d already thought it through, and they’d put up canopies in the field nearby (we don’t own that land), and if all the guests stayed in hotels in the town, she would arrange transport for “us all to get to the villa.”

My wife and I bit our tongues, not wanting to make a fuss during their engagement celebration.

But later, when my niece texted me to repeat what she’d said, I asked her to clarify the sleeping arrangements.

After some back and forth, it came to light that she plans to use the master bedroom as the bridal suite and for the wedding party to have the remaining rooms.

My wife, children, and I would have to stay elsewhere.

Then, things took a turn for the worse.

I slept on my decision and spoke with my wife.

On Sunday I responded and politely refused, saying it’s too small and we aren’t comfortable having anyone in our room.

Both she and my sister blew up at me telling me I was ruining her wedding and she’d always dreamed of marrying at The Castle.

My sister even said since I used my inheritance, it’s “family property,” which is obviously ridiculous.

We texted her on Sunday to offer a compromise: no master bedroom and either get permission/insurance to use the fields or reduce the guest count to 25.

We even offered to host a small rehearsal, but she rejected the offer. That is when we outright refused.

AITA?

It’s easy to see both sides of this issue, but it is their home.

Let’s check out what the folks over at Reddit had to say about his decision.

This person can see both sides but agrees with him.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Here’s an excellent point!

Source: Reddit/AITA

Yet another person who takes his side.

Source: Reddit/AITA

So many reasons it won’t work.

Source: Reddit/AITA

The niece needs to let it go.

There’s no shortage of great wedding venues in Southern Europe; she’ll find something else.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.