Planning a wedding can be very exciting, and you want to do all you can to ensure all your loved ones can be there.

What would you do if your mother hated your fiancé and said she will never come to your home, or the wedding?

That is what the young woman in this story is experiencing and she isn’t sure what to do.

Check it out.

WIBTA for going ahead with a wedding that my mom is violently opposed to

I (25F) have been engaged to my fiancé (27M) for just over two years, and we dated for nearly three years before he proposed.

We set a wedding date back when we got engaged, but postponed it because my family was going through a rough patch and it didn’t feel right at the time.

We are now aiming for April 2025- venue is booked and everything.

However…my mom despises my fiancé.

She says that he has warning signs of an emotional abuser, he is selfish and wants to keep my to himself, and that he is going to turn me into a helpless housewife to just pop out babies for his Southern, racist family.

Both of these people sound like they can make their own decisions.

For clarification, I am a kindergarten teacher, currently pursuing my master’s degree, and have exactly zero plans to have kids in the next five years (which he agrees with!).

He is an electrical engineer, also pursuing a master’s degree, and does not agree with his family’s conservative beliefs.

She lives across the country and recently came to visit for a month.

It ended BADLY.

I mean screaming fights, storming out of the house, and crying until 2am, all of which culminated in me driving her to the airport two weeks early.

She swears she will never step foot back in the state for any reason, and she refuses to be in a room with my fiancé or his family ever.

Sounds like she didn’t give her a chance.

Well, while she was here, I didn’t get a chance to tell her that we are planning to go through with the wedding, things are booked, etc.

I fully intended to, but with all the fighting and turmoil, I didn’t have a chance.

Now, my fiancé and his family are asking questions about where we’re at in the wedding planning process, and I’m really torn about how to answer.

On the one hand, we could reschedule the entire thing and I could work with my mom to get her to agree to come.

On the other hand, we could go through with the wedding, but I would have exactly zero family members present.

Hopefully she will change her position.

I desperately want my mom to be there, but I don’t know if she’ll ever come to terms with my fiancé’s existence and importance in my life.

And I’m not sure I want to keep postponing the wedding because she’s not ready for me to get married yet.

WIBTA?

It doesn’t sound like mom is going to ever change her mind, so no reason to postpone the wedding further.

Perhaps the people in the comments have some good advice, let’s take a look.

This person has a good question.

Good question.

I agree, just have the wedding.

This person thinks there is no solution.

I would be curious about this as well.

It sounds like the mom is never going to change.

Then again, she could be onto something.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.