There are some things in life that are common causes of anxiety amongst many, things that even otherwise cool-headed people might find themselves at the mercy of.

One of these is the dentist.

It’s something about the clinical setting, the noises and sensations, and the complete lack of control as a stranger pokes around in your mouth that can be quite unsettling to say the least.

So how would you handle it if someone made you a dentist appointment without your consent – and not with your dentist, either?

That’s the situation that the woman in this story found herself in.

Read on to find out how this situation highlighted some major cracks in her relationship.

AITA for canceling the dentist appointment my spouse made for me?

My husband and I had an altercation today and I honestly don’t know how to react to it.

My parter called the dentist a week or so ago without my knowledge to set up dental appointments for us both.

Let me start by saying that I have a dentist already and prefer to go there, but haven’t seen them in a long time (maybe a year or so).

I’m also not a huge fan of the dentist, so if I do go I would be far more comfortable being at my dentist than the one that was selected for me.

The appointment was today but I canceled it.

I didn’t want to embarrass my spouse so I called a few hours before my appointment.

Let’s see how this woman’s husband responded to her decision.

On his journey home, my husband called me asked how my day was, then chatted for a bit.

After, he asked me how my dentist appointment was and I told him I canceled.

Honestly, I didn’t think it would be a big deal.

Apparently it was a big deal however, as it started an argument where he called me ridiculous even though I had talked to him earlier about how I did not want to go – and if I did, I would rather go to my own doctor.

I told him I didn’t want to fight, so he proceeded to hang up on me.

He honestly has gotten frustrated in the past so I let it lie and moved on (even though I hate being hung up on and he knows that).

Uh-oh. Read on to see what happened next.

Let me also say that this phone call took place while he was traveling on a dangerous highway in the middle of the night.

He proceeded to block me on Find My and Life 365 (which I only noticed because Life 365 sent me a message).

Usually he gets home a little before 8, so I was worried about him, but he would not answer the phone or texts when I checked up on him.

When he got home it was about 8:30: he stopped to get food making him late.

I tried to hug him or greet him at the door, to which he promptly rejected me and ignored me.

He will not speak to me at all so I asked if he would like me to go to the other room, to which he agreed.

Yikes. Let’s see how the woman felt about his rejection.

I may have not communicated my dislike for the dentist before now, but I’m not sure I should have had to.

I feel like he does things just to upset and get a rise out of me, when I don’t really feel like I have done anything wrong.

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To me he kinda made a big deal out of nothing.

AITA?

First of all, she is scared of the dentist – he makes her an appointment without her consent.

Then when she doesn’t go through with it, instead of wondering why he goes in hard with the stonewalling.

This is not okay.

Let’s see what the folks over on Reddit made of this.

One person pointed out the husband’s behavior for what it was: abusive.

Meanwhile, this commenter wondered if the husband had an ulterior motive.

However, this person thought that perhaps the husband’s caring gesture was being misconstrued.

Regardless of his motives, the majority of the commenters aren’t wrong: this relationship needs better communication and clear boundaries.

His toxic behavior isn’t okay.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.