February 2, 2025 at 1:55 am

Wife Wants Him To Go To Her Friend’s Wedding, But He Decided To Attend An Important Family Birthday Party Instead

by Matthew Gilligan

Source: Shutterstock/Reddit

This is a tough one…

It comes to us from the pages of Reddit’s “Am I the *******?” page and you can tell that this guy is really struggling with his situation.

But he made his choice and now he wants to know if he’s wrong.

Check out his story below and see what you think.

AITA for choosing family over wife’s best friend?

“I just got into a huge fight with my wife regarding attendance of conflicting events.

Her best friend is getting married later this year (east coast), and has told us the dates for about two months now, and we were definitely planning on going (apart from the fact that my wife is the maid of honor).

He got some news…

This is a smaller wedding of around 60 people so only people who her friend REALLY wanted to attend got an invite.

A few days ago, I was told by my family that we were going to have our grandma’s 100 year birthday party on the same day in the west coast.

I thought this was a no brainer and I said if this was any other birthday, I would skip it.

But this is to celebrate her 100th, and I would like to attend the big party and she can go to her friend’s wedding.

Literally the whole family would be there (except her – and my family understands she had a prior obligation) , and many families are traveling from overseas to be in attendance.

Now there’s tension.

My wife is very upset that I had rsvp’ed earlier and that now I’m backing out of attending the wedding.

I can’t really see what the big point is, since we can each attend the event we find more important to our individual lives.

Her main points are:

There are so many people attending the party, they won’t even know you aren’t there.

You committed to wedding earlier than this event (to be honest, I didn’t even know the party until a few days ago)

The fact that I was invited to the small wedding means so much to her friend and would make her sad if I didn’t go and were not part of the pictures (I was part of the “must attend” list)

Parents told me to attend “if you can” which gives me a pass for not going and not hurting anyone’s feeling

We are a “unit” so we should be seen together at these big events so it’s gonna be weird that I’m alone at my thing and she’s alone at her thing.

And then there’s his side.

My main points are:

I like your friend but I’d prefer to celebrate 100th birthday with which is a milestone for not only my grandma but also for my family.

I don’t like my wife thinking for her friend

I want to attend the family event (i feel like this trumps everything all her points)

IDK – I feel like it’s a no brainer but she absolutely lost her **** over this and I don’t feel like I did anything wrong so i can’t even force myself to like try to console her (maybe I’m the ******* for this).

AITA?”

Let’s see how Reddit users reacted.

This person had a lot to say.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Another individual said he’s NTA.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This individual chimed in.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Another person shared their thoughts.

Source: Reddit/AITA

And this reader said he didn’t do anything wrong.

Source: Reddit/AITA

He’s not budging on this one.

And honestly, I’m not sure why he would.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.