The financial responsibilities of married couples should be transparent.

This woman explains that she found out her husband has been paying all the bills for his mom and adult brother.

As a husband and wife, they have their own financial responsibilities, and she thinks he needs to make these bills the priority.

Will this couple be able to get on the same page about their finances?

Read the whole story below

AITAH for wanting my husband to stop paying his family’s bills

I (28F) am married to my husband (30M).

We’ve been together for 5 years.

My husband’s father died when he was a junior in college.

His brother was a senior in high school then.

This woman found out her husband pays his family’s bills.

We just bought our first house, and we were crunching numbers.

I knew my husband “helped” out his family, but I didn’t think that meant he was paying their bigger primary bills while they contributed nothing.

Both his mother and brother have jobs.

For context, my brother-in-law lives with my mother-in-law.

The house is paid off, so there’s no mortgage.

It’s in a “low cost of living” area, so they have low taxes, as well.

Both of them work full time, granted, they’re not highly paid.

MIL stockpiles the majority of her money into savings and rarely spends any of it.

He also helped his mother get a new car.

My MIL got a new car.

It was a while ago, so I don’t necessarily remember exactly what I was told at the time, but I was under the impression my husband co-signed for it.

But I learned the car is fully in his name and MIL pays the payment.

At least that’s not being paid by him, I suppose.

It’s been bothering her.

I don’t want to be the jerk, but it really bothers me.

I feel like my husband and I would be much more comfortable financially.

(Having savings/paying extra towards other bills etc.)

These bills he’s footing shouldn’t be “his responsibility.”

She and her husband are planning for a baby.

We’re wanting to have our first child within the next year or so, but I’m so irked by all of this.

I worry when we do have a child, it still won’t change.

Then we’re going to have our own financial responsibility.

He doesn’t see the issue in all these.

We’ve talked about it.

Granted, I haven’t been pushy, but ultimately, he doesn’t see an issue.

I’m wondering if it’s just cultural or if it’s just about being the oldest son.

She wonders why he is doing it.

Does it come with the feeling of “needing to provide” since his father died?

I’m really not sure.

But would I be the jerk if I had a more serious conversation? If I would request him to stop paying these bills for them? And ask him to tell them they needed to step up and cover some/all?

He’s spending $1000 monthly for his family’s bills.

The bills being paid by my husband is around $1000/month.

It’s two separate bills, and each one is for all three of them.

If he removed himself and just paid his portion, it would be about $150/mo.

It’s definitely important that they are on the same page about their finances. She needs to talk this out with him.

Let’s find out what others have to say about this on Reddit.

This user shares their personal thoughts.

While this person offers some sensible advice.

This person makes a valid point.

This person thinks his mom and brother are the ones at fault.

And lastly, a short and straightforward remark from this person.

A good husband puts his current home and family first.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.