Mother’s Day can bring out a lot of difficult feelings in both parents and children.

What would you do if your Dad texted you to reprimand you for not visiting on Mother’s Day, even though you have your own family now?

That is what happened to the young Mother in this story, so she is hurt and upset and thinking about responding with a snide text of her own.

Check it out.

AITA my dad reprimanded me for spending Mother’s Day with just my husband and my daughter

I (26f) always sought approval from my parents when I was growing up.

If I wasn’t living up to their standards, I was made to feel like I was absolute trash.

My husband (28m) and I got married in the beginning of 2023.

We had our daughter just over a year later in 2024.

That is unfortunate, but not a huge deal.

My parents are moving 1300 miles away at some point this year, some point soon as their house is already on the market.

We bought our home last year after strongly considering their advice to stay here since we have family here thus would have “help” instead of moving to another state we would MUCH prefer to live in and being alone.

Not blaming them, we are adults and bought a home that suited us for now but I’m just saying a huge factor of us staying in this state is that my parents live about an hour away as do my in-laws.

All of this is relevant for context because today is Mother’s Day, likely the last one that my parents will be within driving distance of us.

So far, so good.

I called my mom this morning to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day.

She asked me what my plans are today and I said absolutely nothing but spending quality time with my husband and my daughter (we do have a contractor coming to our house to prepare a quote for some work we need to get done, which I told her).

About twenty minutes later, I get the following text from my dad:

What was stopping Mom and Dad from driving down? Cars work both ways.

“You weren’t raised the way you have been behaving. You only have one mother, you’re 75 minutes away, not half way around the world. 🌎 a phone call on one day of the year? It’s Mother’s Day!!!! I love you very much. Have a wonderful day. Will say no more about it. You’re adult, wife, mother, daughter, etc.”

I’ll be honest, the first thing that went through my mind to say was “screw you”.

Nothing like sending a reprimanding text to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day.

Then I just started crying because this is the same thing they always do.

They don’t prefer a choice I made about my own life so now they want to guilt me into doing what they want me to do.

They did this when we told them we wanted to move across the country to another state.

They have done this throughout my entire life.

Well, I’m at the point where I don’t want to be manipulated anymore.

My life does not revolve around them.

I agree with her on this.

I have my own little family who I have a duty and obligation to.

Nobody is entitled to my time except for my husband and my daughter.

I don’t believe that parents have the same rights to their kids as kids have to their parents.

Said differently, my daughter owes me absolutely nothing but I owe her everything.

In contrast, my MIL texted me this morning: “Happy Mother’s Day! Do you want our help today?”

That is very nice of her.

You know, offering to babysit for us so I could spend some alone time with my husband if I wanted to.

There is a stark contrast here which is why I think maybe I’m not being a jerk.

I don’t know how to respond so I haven’t.

A part of me wants to be snide and just screenshot the search results for “grandparents day” and send solely the screenshot in response.

AITA?

Mom and Dad were out of line, but there is no reason to escalate the issue.

I’d just stay quiet to keep the peace.

Let’s see what the people in the comments think about this story.

This is exactly what I was thinking as well.

This is a great rule.

This person says not to get upset.

This commenter has a similar family dynamic.

This would be a great reply to the text.

It sounds like this Mother needs to realize that she isn’t the only Mom in the family anymore.

Hard, but necessary.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.