When people leave things behind, they don’t always come back for them.

What would you do if you were asked to hold on to someone’s ashes, only to be ghosted by the entire family?

Would you keep them out of respect?

Or would you dispose of them in the trash can?

In the following story, one woman finds herself dealing with this very decision and is unsure what to do.

Here’s what’s going on.

AITA If I throw away someone’s remains if no one in his family wants his ashes?

Long story short, a roommate & I shared an apartment from 2018-2022.

She was separated from her husband when he died in 2021.

He was cremated, and his ashes were mailed to her.

She kept him in a box in a closet in the laundry room.

In 2022, she bought an RV & moved to Brenham to be near her daughter & grandchildren.

She asked me to hold on to the ashes & a few other things, pics, clothing, I agreed.

She couldn’t be near the ashes, they set her on edge & just rattled her.

We had a falling out over money, more than 5K.

I haven’t heard from her since September 2024.

I know she has some serious health issues she is dealing with, I really don’t want to talk to her, so my feelings aren’t hurt.

She has done everything possible to find a home for them.

I reached out to his son Dom Jr., a real estate agent, on Messenger in February 2025 about his father’s ashes.

He responded, but he has made no effort to retrieve the ashes either.

Did I mention she also basically walked away from her youngest son, who she left living in an RV in my backyard?

What was supposed to be a short-term favor has turned into 3 yrs of her 40-something schizophrenic bipolar w/audio hallucinations living on my 6 acres.

I would give him the ashes, but I don’t think he would handle it well at all & I don’t know what kind of episode it could trigger.

He took the death badly, as his whole world as he knew it ended.

He’s never lived on his own & he is not doing a very good job at it.

In February, I threatened that if no one made arrangements to come get these ashes, I’d throw them in the dumpster.

AITA?

Wow! To be honest, this is kind of a sad story all the way around.

Let’s see what advice the people over at Reddit have to offer.

This seems to be a very good idea.

Here’s another idea that could work.

As for this person, they would try the son again.

Here’s another thoughtful solution.

Throwing away the ashes is wrong.

At the very least, she should find a nice place to bury or spread them.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.