It’s important and decent to respect peoples’ limitations and preferences.

It’s also important to communicate said limitations and preferences clearly, otherwise, how can anyone respect them?

But eggs are not dairy. Full stop.

Read on to find out how that became a huge point of contention.

AITAH for making a dairy free cake with eggs?

My friend invited me over for dinner.

Our tradition is to bring food when invited to dinner.

I asked if I should bring a dessert.

She said that would be great but it needs to be dairy free because her daughter stopped eating dairy.

That’s fine, and good on her for respecting her daughter’s wishes. Not all parents do.

I know a great cake recipe with no dairy.

I brought it to the dinner and it was a big hit.

My friend asked for the recipe and I told her.

When I got to the eggs her daughter became upset and ran upstairs.

What eggsactly was going on?

My friend asked why I put eggs in the cake.

I said the eggs were responsible for the spongy texture.

She said the cake wasn’t dairy free.

I said it was.

There is no milk or milk products in the cake, no cheese, no butter, etc…

The Oxford dictionary defines dairy as “containing or made from milk.”

I’ve never spoken to anyone, ever, who understood it to mean anything else.

My friend said eggs are dairy.

I was confused.

Dairy is milk and milk products to my understanding.

She said dairy is anything that comes from an animal.

I asked if honey is dairy then.

She said no, because bees are insects.

I apologized, but I could tell she was still upset.

Nope.

You’re thinking of the term “animal products,” and honey is included in that definition.

You just…don’t know what words mean.

Am I the [jerk]?

I’ve never heard of eggs being dairy before.

Let’s see the reaction of the comments:

The word you’re looking for is “vegan,” except that would actually include a ban on honey, so you’re just gonna need to list specifics.

Like, what is there to say?

To put it bluntly:

Look, there’s nothing wrong with being wrong.

There’s nothing wrong with accidentally using the wrong word.

There’s something super wrong with being unwilling to admit you’re wrong, or, you know, check.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.