Being in a controlling relationship sounds horrible.

Sure, it’s natural to have some concerns and ground rules in a relationship in order to be able to spend time together and to look out for each other’s safety, but dictating how the other person does or does not spend their time at all hours is too much!

The woman in today’s story just wants to go to the park, but her boyfriend has reasons why she can’t go at night or on the weekend. She’s pretty fed up with his opinions about how she should spend her time.
Let’s read the whole story.

AITAH for going to the park after my boyfriend (26M) told me (25F) not to?

My bf and I have been together for 7 years, living together for 5 years.

I’m lucky to have a job that’s very flexible and I choose to work 7-3.

My bf has a very strict job and he normally works 4:30am- 3pm, because of how early he needs to wake up, he normally goes to bed at 7pm.

So, we only get about 3 hours together every night because it takes about an hour to get home from work. We normally come directly home after work because we have so little time together during the weekdays.

Her boyfriend has a lot of opinions about how she should spend her free time.

He doesn’t want me to leave after he goes to bed because of it being dark, for my safety, which I understand.

But the only time I can go out and do things is on the weekends.

He wants me to stay home on the weekends with him (because he is exhausted and his feet hurt) but when am I ever supposed to go out and do things if he is constantly wanting me to stay home because “it’s dangerous to go out alone”.

I don’t live in a horribly dangerous place- I live on the east coast of the US in a suburb of a major city.

She is really frustrated with her boyfriend.

I’m not a small woman and I’m not stupid so I don’t understand why I’m not allowed out on my own.

I feel trapped and like I’m on a leash.

It stopped feeling protective and started feeling controlling a long time ago.

When I told him I wanted to go to the park and out in nature he said to me “I sacrifice every week doing stuff for you that I don’t want to do.” Saying that I should stay home for him because he does stuff that he doesn’t want to do all the time.

She knows her boyfriend is just worried about her.

The part where I might be the jerk is that he just lost a close relative and he has crazy amounts of anxiety because he only has me and his dad left in his life. So I understand he is just trying to keep me safe.

Am I not being understanding of his anxiety? Is it really that dangerous out there alone as a woman? Should I keep from doing “dangerous things” to not make him more anxious than he already is?

If it’s not safe to got out after dark, then she’s going to have to start going out during the day and leave her boyfriend and his tired feet home alone. As far as safety, maybe she could meet up with a friend. There’s power in numbers.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This person thinks the boyfriend has mental issues.

He’s not her parent.

This person asks some good questions.

This is a very good point!

She needs to start doing what she wants to do regardless of what her boyfriend thinks about it.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.