Being there for family is one thing, but not when it means sacrificing the little time you get to rest.

So, what would you do if your sister’s baby shower got moved to the middle of your only family holiday, and people started hinting that you should cut your trip short to be there?

Would you change your plans to avoid feeling guilty?

Or would you do what’s best for your immediate family instead?

In today’s story, one woman finds herself in this very situation and needs advice on how to handle it.

Here’s what happened.

AITA for not going to my sisters baby shower?

My family lives 2 hours away from me. I’m not really close with them, and never have been.

My sister is pregnant and we’re of course throwing her a baby shower.

Her sister in law is the head organizer, which is really nice of her.

We set the date in August, and almost everyone was able to come.

That’s great.

Now, suddenly, someone is not able to come, so the date has changed to July 19.

I’m on holiday then, with my two kids, partner, my dad, and stepmom are also with us.

We are supposed to come back in the evening on July 20.

Her little sister sees it differently.

Now my little sister said in the group that I could arrange for my family and I to come back 2 days prior, so I’m able to come.

I said, if there really is no other way, I might ask, but yeah.

I don’t want to do it.

I’m chronically ill and can’t do much. I’ve been at home for over 6 months, I can barely do anything, and that has also resulted in poor mental health.

My partner works his butt off and really deserves a proper holiday as do my parents and my kids.

She doesn’t feel right putting this on her family.

It just seems unfair to ask my family (who are not coming to the baby shower, by the way) to end the holiday 2 days early because of the baby shower.

Also means a day of travel, not a lot of sleep, and then go straight to a party (I can’t do a lot of things straight after another because of my illness).

I just don’t want to even ask my family to do this. Mainly because I don’t want to.

I just feel like a jerk for not wanting to.

We’re not super close, and busy events are really hard and difficult, especially around the pregnancy theme.

I’d prefer to come by another time and bring a present and do something for them, I don’t know.

AITA?

Yikes! It’s easy to see both sides of this, but her sister comes across a bit selfish.

Let’s see how the folks over at Reddit feel about it.

For this person, the sister needs to get over it.

This person would tell her they couldn’t come.

According to this comment, there’s no reason to make that sacrifice.

Great point!

Until the plans changed, she was going to be there.

This is not her fault.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.