When your kids get in trouble, it’s understandable that you want to help.

But every parent knows that sometimes kids have to fight their own battles.

And sometimes, you have to know when to step away and truly let them sort things out for themselves.

For the woman in this story, that time has well and truly come.

Read on to find out what happened to make her say no to her son, once and for all.

AITA for not giving my son $10K?

My son married his high school sweetheart in 2011.

Their marriage was a disaster for many reasons, but the end result was that they had two kids then divorced seven to eight years ago.

They live in VA, which is known as a state that favors mothers’ custody.

She has primary custody and he has some visitation.

Let’s see how the situation is panning out now.

My son is getting hit pretty hard on child support and wants to have 50/50 custody of his kids as well as being fully informed on medical, school, etc.

We totally agree with those desires.

His ex-wife is very bad at communications, the recent court ordered co-parenting sessions were horrible.

We doubt how she acts is going to change.

But, since he has been a teenager, our son has had a tendency to believe that if he really wants something to have a certain result, he will get it.

As a result, he has been to court with his ex multiple times, most recently asking again for shared custody.

He truly believes, each time, that he will get what he wants regardless of past history.

Read on to find out what happened when the man took his ex-wife to court.

The first time he went to court (this round) he represented himself and got his butt handed to him.

So he got a lawyer, spent more time with the kids’ GAL and went back to court, this time with the lawyer. He spent over $10K, and owes $13K more.

He got marginally better results, but had a follow-up end of June. That follow up was last Friday and he represented himself again.

He came out angry and “too raw” to talk about it. But he did leave me a long text message expressing how very disappointed he was in me.

Let’s find out how he managed to blame the whole situation on his own mom.

As his mother, and the grandmother of the kids, he expected me to move heaven and earth to help him afford a lawyer.

He knows we have our own issues (my husband, his step-father is currently fighting cancer) but he NEEDED me and I failed him and his kids.

He expected more of me and was let down.

The end of that note said that he didn’t want to talk about it because he was so raw he would “devolve into an anger monster” and say things he shouldn’t.

So she chose her response very carefully.

He didn’t want to talk, so I didn’t call. I did text him that was one of the most disappointing things I’ve ever read from him.

He didn’t understand but we could talk about it later.

Today I got another very long text from him, asking if I could give him $10K – and not only would it be paid back once his child support got lowered but that would guarantee he would get custody of his children.

He went on to say he has a slim chance at a mistrial but he almost won’t do it without a lawyer (smart) – and then he went into full manipulation mode giving me the reasons he can’t hire a lawyer so as their grandmother, as his mother, will I loan him the money if he files for a mistrial?

Let’s see how she responded to his emotional manipulation.

Ok, to me, he is assuming that 1) he has the grounds for a mistrial 2) his child support amount would be lowered 3) he would get more custody of his girls and 4) that $10K would solve all of those problems.

He is 40+. Shouldn’t he be relying more on himself?

We have bailed him out financially once before with car loan he ran away from for more then $10K.

He doesn’t seem to be learning, so I want to say no.

AITA?

This woman has enough of her own problems to be dealing with, without having to pay for her son’s mistakes too.

Sure, she is his mother and the grandmother of the children, but the doesn’t mean that her money should slide straight into his pocket.

It must be a tough and emotional time for him for sure, but emotionally manipulating his mother is unacceptable regardless.

Let’s see what Reddit had to say about this.

This person agreed that she was doing the right thing by denying his request.

While this lawyer explained that the son was twisting the story he told his mother.

Meanwhile, others were more concerned about the son’s behavior.

Even if she could afford to hand $10k to her son, sometimes it’s really better not to.

This man needs to learn, not only how to handle money, but how to handle his own emotions.

And manipulating his own mother is not the way to handle anything.

Sure he’s upset not to have custody of his kids, but his mother’s partner is fighting cancer – all while he is guilt-tripping her.

She doesn’t deserve this.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.