When a sibling is getting married, you want to be there for their wedding to celebrate alongside them.

What would you do if your sister was planning to get married on a Disney cruise, but you couldn’t afford it?

That is what was happening to the sister in this story, so now she wonders if she would be wrong for not attending.

Let’s read the whole story.

WIBTA if I didn’t go to my sisters cruise wedding?

So my (27f) sister Alex (28f) just finalized her divorce and got engaged 3 days later to a guy (24m) she has been seeing for about a year.

There was definitely some overlap and this post isn’t inherently about that drama, but it is probably affecting my judgement.

A wedding on a cruise ship can be nice.

Anyway, the day after her announced engagement, Alex messages a group chat with my mom in it and says that she really wants a wedding on a Disney cruise. She send screenshots of the wedding package and some of the dates.

My mom and I responded that a 7-day cruise is too long and expensive so she responds with a screenshot of a 5-day cruise with no pricing in the pic.

At this point, I am not too excited to see that she wants a cruise wedding, but I didn’t say anything negative yet, as I was going to see her that weekend and hopefully bring it up gently then.

She is moving forward with this.

The following days are a follow ups of venue options on and off the boat and the itinerary, until on Friday, she sends a video invitation to the group chat.

I ask if that is the final invitation.

Alex responds that it is, she was sending it to friends and family already.

I figure this is the time to drop the bomb that this is a very expensive wedding for her guests.

How will her sister take the news?

She responds that its okay, she only wants a small wedding and that people can pay it off in installments.

I say “what about everyone who already has booked vacations, can’t take more time off?”

She assures me that 9 months in plenty of time.

My mom chimes in that there is no way our elderly grandparents would be able to come as 1 of them is already wheelchair bound.

She says that’s fine too.

These seem like good suggestions.

I started to make some suggestions: a small family dinner before the cruise in our home state PA/NJ (cruise takes off from FL), a FL Disney resort wedding before the cruise, a Bahamas Disney resort wedding that we can meet her there, and pushing the date to something later/cheaper.

She says this is what she wants, she already booked it, and she apparently has been talking about this with fiancé for a while.

She ran some numbers.

So I made a spreadsheet including the cruise tickets, gratuity, flights, a hotel, transport, and dog sitting prices and it would cost me and my husband around $6000 to attend this wedding.

We already had 1 booked vacation before Alex’s date and another for a couple months after the date so we would be stretched thin money-wise. It’s unlikely my husband has enough vacation days so he would be losing a few days of pay as well.

I tell her all these things that would possibly prevent me from going.

She says “If you don’t wanna go I get it”.

Her sister is very excited about the wedding.

Alex talked it up during that weekend we saw each other: it would be fun and like a family vacation.

She wasn’t going to expect gifts, bachelorette party, mandatory activities on the boat, etc.

I just think that she really rushed into choosing the wedding right after getting engaged and didn’t care about what I had to say about the matter.

My mom has the same concerns, but is going to go regardless of the cost because it is her daughter.

WIBTA if I didn’t go to my sisters cruise wedding? Even if it was financially possible for me to go?

AITA?

If she can’t afford it, there is no reason to feel bad about not going. But she also shouldn’t expect to have her sister plan her wedding around her sister’s vacation plans.

Let’s see what the people in the comments on Reddit think about it.

I agree with this commenter.

Each person is able to decide what is best for themselves.

She is under no obligation to go to the wedding.

Yup, destination weddings are a lot smaller.

It’s her wedding; let her have it where she wants.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.