September 30, 2025 at 11:15 am

Her Parents Want Her To Help Pay For Her Brother’s Grad School Tuition, But She Doesn’t Want To Do It

by Matthew Gilligan

woman with a surprised expression

Shutterstock/Reddit

Something fishy is going on here, folks…

And the woman who wrote this story on Reddit’s “Am I the *******?” page isn’t having it!

Is she doing anything wrong?

Read her story below and see if you think she’s ******* in this situation.

Start now!

AITA My parents are forcing me to pay for my brother’s grad school using money they never told me about.

“I’ve (30F) been financially independent since graduating college.

I worked practically full-time while studying, recently paid off my student loans on my own, and just started saving to buy a home.

I didn’t apply to grad school because I couldn’t afford it, and my parents made it pretty clear growing up that we needed to stand on our own after high school.

My brother (22M) is honestly a genius. He worked really hard in school, got a full academic ride to a great state school, and graduated with honors. I’m so, so proud of him.

The problem now is he recently got into an extremely prestigious grad program that would open a lot of doors for him.

He was hoping for scholarships or a paid internship to cover most of it, but it’s not enough. Now he’s facing tuition and housing costs in one of the most expensive cities in the country.

My parents asked if I could help out and suggested I contribute around $15,000 to get him through the first year. They’d match it, and he’d take loans for the rest.

She’s not gonna do it.

I said no.

I’ve been working for over a decade on my own goals, and I’m just now starting to save for a house. I don’t feel comfortable putting that on hold, especially when I had to turn down opportunities because there was no help available to me.

During the conversation, my mom got frustrated and said they’d be using my “other fund” to help him instead.

Huh?

I asked what she meant, and she said they had set aside about $25,000 for me back when I was in college, meant to be used for a future wedding. I was completely blindsided. I had no idea this fund existed.

I asked why I wasn’t told about it when I was considering grad school, or now while I’m saving for a home.

She said it was always intended for a wedding, not school or property, and since I haven’t needed it (I’m not engaged or in a relationship), they decided to give it to my brother because he has a more immediate need.

She was upset about this.

I’m not going to lie, I was ****** off. I never got a chance to make a case for how I could’ve used that money, and now it’s just being handed over to someone else. I told them I felt hurt and left out.

My mom said I was being unfair, and that the money was never promised, and if I didn’t want it for a wedding, then it made sense to use it for something meaningful.

My brother told me he didn’t know about the wedding fund either, and he understands why I’d be upset, but said he didn’t ask for it. He just wants to go to school and thought we were all trying to support each other.

I know my brother worked hard and isn’t trying to take anything from me. But I can’t help feeling like my parents are punishing me for being practical.”

Let’s see how Reddit users reacted to this story.

This person said she’s NTA.

Screenshot 2025 08 05 at 5.26.56 PM Her Parents Want Her To Help Pay For Her Brothers Grad School Tuition, But She Doesnt Want To Do It

Another individual shared their thoughts.

Screenshot 2025 08 05 at 5.27.18 PM Her Parents Want Her To Help Pay For Her Brothers Grad School Tuition, But She Doesnt Want To Do It

This reader weighed in.

Screenshot 2025 08 05 at 5.27.45 PM Her Parents Want Her To Help Pay For Her Brothers Grad School Tuition, But She Doesnt Want To Do It

Another person spoke up.

Screenshot 2025 08 05 at 5.27.53 PM Her Parents Want Her To Help Pay For Her Brothers Grad School Tuition, But She Doesnt Want To Do It

And this Reddit user said she’s NTA.

Screenshot 2025 08 05 at 5.28.11 PM Her Parents Want Her To Help Pay For Her Brothers Grad School Tuition, But She Doesnt Want To Do It

This doesn’t sound very fair, now does it?

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.